So anyone following my racing (because I know there are legions of you), knows that 2023 has been an unmitigated dumpster fire for me, pretty much from the get go. A tweaked achilles in January led to me trying to run through it, which of course led to it getting worse. The coup de grace was fittingly a fun run in my neighborhood, which I ran like it was an Olympic final, and left my heel just wrecked. I took 6 weeks off and the pain came right back.
Finally I was encouraged/shamed to go to physical therapy by Joyce and Mara. Who needs PT when your legs are Hulk like due to carrying around a dad bod doing 19 minute 5ks for a decade? Apparently I did. Eight weeks later I did all my exercises, got my butt kicked at Vertex by Dr. Chhoun and came out on the other side. The Achilles, while not back to absolutely 100 percent, is close enough. The comeback has been pretty brutal but I’ve been able to dip below 20 a couple of times since.
But the most crucial victory from PT Is enabling me to get back to the serious business of running in ridiculous costumes. The absolute pinnacle of this race cosplay is of course the Shandon Turkey Trot and Burn. All my other costumes are pretty easy to run in, but this outfit, “GOBBLES THE TURKEY” from Party City, is an absolute monstrosity. Constricting turkey head hat, giant wings and trailing tail, and above all a turkey gut like someone’s beer swilling alcoholic uncle. Just hideous. But also, insane-looking enough to maximize my apparent insatiable need for attention. Always have to be the main character.
I got to the race even earlier than my standard hour, and sans suit, because 1) Driving in this thing would probably lead to getting pulled over for presumed intoxication/psychosis and 2) Portapotty pooping would be a logistical nightmare. After packet pickup and detonation of the facilities, I did a warm up with the Yerg. He dresses as my holiday counterpart Santa Claus, if Santa went beardless and had gastric bypass surgery. I’m sure the visual was interesting, and perhaps prophetic.
I get to the start and this event has obviously gotten insanely popular. Erin says there’s over 700 registered. Pretty impressive for a race on its deathbed a few years ago. Lots of fast people out there. I figure Kushinka will take it but there’s a couple of speedy kids and the Allerses brought their friend from Fort Mill (Josh Odell) who tore up the Mt Moriah course. The ladies’ field had Christa and Ashley, as well as grandmasters machine Shannon Godby. Jessa sadly did not want to risk getting a repeat turkey beatdown.
The course is pretty much an out and back Shandon rectangle with some rolling hills. Fairly flat. I ran 19:09 last year in the suit but would be happy to get low 20s this year with my epically disastrous 2023. With the gun, everyone takes off and blasts down the opening stretch of Woodrow. I’ve been doing less races and mostly slow mileage slog jogs, so this pace feels brutal. Regan, Yerg and Brandenburg are just killing it, and even Kirkwood is leaving me in the dust. I can feel the turkey hat constricting around my neck and my heels kicking the tail and wonder why the hell I do this to myself. But with the turn on Heyward, I start to get my wind back. Roy Shelley and I run the second half mile in a CRC past/present presidential tandem. First mile was in 6:33, a shade over 20 minute pace (6:26).
At some point, I catch up to Sarah Allers who tells me to go chase her husband, but he has a pretty substantial lead. Yerg and Shannon are pretty far ahead too. I basically maintain pace in mile 2 as we hit the turnaround on Bonham near the old Dry Run 5k course and come back on Wilmot. At some point I feel like I actually have some gas in the tank and start slowly pushing the pedal down, and manage to catch up to Eric, who offers some “words of encouragement” that may be unprintable. Mile 2 in an identical 6:33. With the turn back onto Heyward, I can see Shannon and Rob up ahead. I thought they were uncatchable, but now I feel like they’re slowly getting reeled back in. Some fit looking unknown masters dude, which I thought I passed, is keeping up with me, perhaps not taking too kindly to being upstaged by a dad bod in a turkey suit. I start launching into the Blue shoe kick as we approach Woodrow again, gliding by Shannon and pulling up alongside emaciated Santa, aka the YERG. Yerg is definitely getting back into shape, and he surges forward when he sees the brown gut enter his peripheral vision. The Woodrow straightaway is super flat but also painfully long. I can see the finish and I’m afraid I pushed in the chips too early because I’m sucking wind like there’s no tomorrow. Yerg and I are blasting side by side in the home stretch, making for an absolutely absurd scene. We hit a pack of spectators near Hand Middle, screaming at me “HEY, THANKSGIVING COMES BEFORE CHRISTMAS!!!” With that, I take a few more steps into the pain cave and pass Santa Yerg. Fit masters dude apparently slipped in front while we were distracted and had another gear to avoid getting double costumed. I can make out the 19s on the clock as we pass Blossom street and give it one last blast, crossing the line in 19:50ish. A far cry from last year, but I’ll still take a sub 20 any day of the week. Good enough for 1st in AG, as the masters dudes were too strong this year. I was consoled with my golden turkey trophy, second place in the costume contest (behind Clara Nance’s epic cloth turkey) and a free post-race beer at Backstreets. Not too shabby.
In the overall, David Olds from Massachusetts edged Dr. Kuskinka for 1st place with Josh Odell taking third, all well under 17 minutes. Among the ladies, Christa took 1st in 19:35, with Ashley 2nd and Eli Roth 3rd. Masters female winners were Shannon Godby, Devanise Vitti and Sarah Allers, who broke 21 minutes and scored a 91.5% world class age grade! Male masters saw Jeff Brandenburg take 2ndbetween two out-of -staters Wesley Gurley and Stephen Harvey (aka not THAT Steve Harvey, and aka fit masters dude from above).
Age Group honor roll (WOMEN): Dorothy Hutchins and Lilly Holman took top 2 in the 11-14. Lauren Holliday won the 20-24 while Veronica Watson took the 30-34. Kara Stevens won the 35-39
Age group honor roll (MEN): James Holliday took the 15-19, Regan Freeman was tops in the 25-29. Yerg was 2nd in the 45-49 with Michael Beets 3rd. Eric Aller and Kirkwood were 1-2 in the 50-54. Roy Shelley, Frank Seier and Winston Holliday swept the 55-59. Dave Hale pushed the run to 2nd in the 60-64. Pete O’Boyle and Tommy Outlaw were top 2 in the 65-69. George Cassidy, Jerry Rich, and Alex Ponomarev swept the 70-74 podium while Ron Hagell, Richard Wright and Ken Lowden did the same in the 75-79. CRC legend Jesse Smarr won 2ndin the 80+ at age 86! Kristin Wallace was 2nd in the 25-29 with Shelby Taylor 3rd. Tracy Tisdale was champ of the 50-54. Barb Brandenburg and Kimberly Holliday took the top 2 in the 55-59 while Melody Kreiling and Lisa Powell did the same in the 60-64. Carol Wallace, Beverly Breur and Mary Cassidy swept a super competitive 65-69. Lynn Grimes and Sharon Sherbourne were 1-2 in the 70-74.
Other notable finishers: Antjuan Seawright, Joey Swearingen, Eric Gilfus, John Holliday, Emmet Maas, Thomas Outlaw, Sophia Homeyer, Michael Beaudet, Missy Caughman, Clara Beaudet, Jennifer Glass, Patrick Hall, Scarlett and Sara Hutchins, Stevie Dee Dukes, Gretchen Lambert, Jessalyn Smith, Louis Krause, Teresa Harrington, Cheryl Outlaw, Nicole Charlton, Rusty Painter, Melinda Waldrop, Teresa Shelton, Traci Brock , Wendy Homeyer, Pam Griffin, Pete Pore, Deanna Rennick, Gabby Swearingen, Kelly Hynes, Tee Coker, Maria Pray, Bertha Woehl, Shiela Bolin, Heather Hawn, Kerry Stubbs, Margie Shelburg, Lisa Smarr and Paul Laymon.
https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/81020#resultSetId-426728;perpage:100
Tour de Blue Shoes 