Stomp the Swamp 5k – River Bluff High School – Lexington, SC – 8/29/15

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Photo credit: Wendy Hart

Stomp the Swamp is a 5k course run entirely on the River Bluff High School campus and goes to benefit their high school cross country teams. It’s put on by Derek Gomez, their coach, who also has a part-time gig beating the crap out of me in road races and triathlons. Not to mention making everybody else around him feel very unfit. But at least he’s nice while he’s doing it. First year was a success in 2014, so Gomez was hoping for even bigger this time around.

The race is hard to categorize, but would probably be closest to the Crooked 5k in Chapin – a high school cross country style course that is actually mostly paved.  Start and finish are really cool in the River Bluff football stadium, which would make most small colleges proud. I mean it has a swank press box, gigantic video scoreboard and a posh looking area over the endzone, which I can only assume is for elite donors or something. Pretty nice.

The course is pretty tough but definitely unique. I somehow survived joy rides on Corley Mill rd back in high school, when it was a narrow roller coaster of death through the woods. Now I’d have to be running this thing. First mile is flat out of the stadium then a climb out to the entrance road. You then get to hike up a paved mountain (the announcer was calling this the “calf crusher”) only to circle around a cone and plummet back down to the entrance road.  For mile 2, you then go across a parking lot, over a covered bridge and slight incline to a second entrance road. Then there’s a twisting paved trail that hides the fact you are going straight up a hill. Dont worry, your quads will remind you. Once you reach the top of the paved trail hill (about 1.75 miles) the rest is almost all downhill and flat. You careen down the trail hill, out into a parking lot, pass the 2 mile mark, and a long downhill . A very short uptick near the front of the stadium, before cruising downhill again and onto the football field for the finish. In short, lots of climbing in the first 2 miles with a very fast 3rd.

I knew this one would be tough for me, but I’ve been able to start speedwork with Team Utopia South again, albeit a lot slower after all the injury downtime. I ran last year’s race in decent shape and still didnt break 20 minutes, not to mention getting brutally chicked by Bri Hartley and Anna Jenkins. Shame has new meaning when you get smoked by girls born in the 21st century.  So I figured anything south of 21 minutes would be acceptable.

The only problem to my race strategy was the Social Distortion show in Charlotte on Friday night. My friend going with me even asked me months ago – “won’t you be running a race that next morning??” “I’ll be fine” I said. To quoth Social D, “I was wrong”.  There  was dinner at a Charlotte bar, 2 opening acts, a long show, a 1:30 am arrival time back in Columbia, and a very thirsty Sasquatch throughout. I woke up at 5:30 feeling like my head fell off another cliff and my mouth stuffed with cotton balls. Nice work, hero.  I’m forty years old but apparently my 19 year old brain still hasn’t gotten the memo.

Most people would probably bail at this point, but my race obsession knows no bounds. I was shotgunning Gatorade, Tylenol, Ibuprofen and coffee the whole way to Lexington, cursing my poor beer mathematics throughout. Showed up late, looking like death warmed over. Got my packet, finished another round of toilet destruction and did a snail’s pace mile and a half. This was  going to suck.

Which is too bad, because it was an absolutely perfect morning. Unbelievably cool for an August morning, like mid 60’s and low humidity. There was a pretty big crowd on hand. I couldn’t scope out the competition too well , since F3 and FiA had huge groups doing a pre-race workout as part of a double down event associated with the race. A lot of these guys looked pretty fit, but difficult to tell if they could run. I was sure there had to be a few of the stealth superfit soccer dads that trash my trophy  hunts on a regular basis.  No clear elites in this race. Avery Johnson (last year’s winner) and the Dutch Fork team had a meet elsewhere and I didnt see Plex, Ashton or Justin. Team Utopia South fielded Michael Nance, the Yerg, Joyce, Julia, Mike Compton and myself. I decided to not disgrace the black and gold this morning. Robbie “OG” McClendon and Nicole came all the way from Bishopville, which was cool. Ty Thomas was on hand, hoping for another pic showdown like our battle at Lexington Race Against Hunger. I told him there was no chance of that. Arnold Floyd, Peter Mugglestone,  Rocky Soderberg, Henry Holt, Leeds Barroll, Pete Poore, Brigitte Smith, Eric Bopp, Devon Shirley and Jennifer Conrick were some familiar faces. The Code and Wendy Hart showed up to spectate and help take pics.

I was feeling marginally better at the start, as some of my hangover concoction started kicking in. I lined up pretty much on the first row and got passed by a ton of people before we even left the stadium. The first quarter mile gives you some flat before the pain begins. Nance and some other guy already were separating from the field. I saw Rob and Ty up ahead, and damned if Compton wasn’t crushing it out of the gate too. I had no idea how to pace under my current conditioning and decidedly poor “race prep” so I was flying blind. I was definitely not going to push it though – no need to end the no-puke streak. Brief climb to the entrance road then up the “calf crusher”. I heard the stadium announcer talking about the “leaders heading into the parking lot” but it turns out it was just Wendy and the Code trying to haul ass to get a better vantage point for pics. Nice speed work guys.  The calf crusher sucked as expected. Ty was already mocking me for being so slow when he saw me on his way back down. He’s known for his psychological torture tactics. I made the turn and gimpily ran down the mountain, fearful of reinviting the shin splint and plantar fasciitis combo back into my life.  The crusher dumped you back into a parking lot for  mile 1 – 6:58. Through the covered breezeway, then up onto road number 2 and the start of the paved trail. I had briefly pulled ahead of Compton but he passed me again on the road. On the paved trail we were shoulder-to-shoulder, breathing like an industrial machine, total Geary McAlister style. I tried to drop him but he was riding me like a monkey and my grizzly bear agility wasn’t helping me with all the twists and turns. Finally I broke free a little as we reached the summit of the trail hill and started the downhill section. I was basically flopping all over the place on the way down, trying not to slip and fall, which I’m really good at (see July 2013).  The trail dumped out into another parking lot and it was great to have some flat, straight pavement again (Dean Schuster and Rick Stroud shudder in unison). Mile 2 in 6:58 again. I felt pretty good, probably because I had finally cleared out last night’s toxins and probably because some part of me realized I was doing something north of my old half marathon pace. Time to pull an Emeril and kick it up a notch. It helped there was a nice slight downhill by this point. A muscular looking F3 dude was ahead of me and I got close enough to see some slight flecks of gray in his hair. AGE GROUPER! Must take him down. I took a tentative step into the pain cave and started ramping up a kick, though there was at least a half mile to go. We went plunging down a hill and I managed to pass F3 guy with the slight incline in front of the stadium. I looked up ahead and was surprised to see the Yerg. I knew he was up near the leaders at the beginning, so he must be fading. I start spelunking the pain cave even further as I pass another guy and blast into full on blue shoe mode. I’m sucking wind like there’s no tomorrow on the road outside the stadium but I get a jolt of adrenaline once I hit the artificial turf of the football field. One lap in the stadium and my lungs are begging for mercy. But the Yerg is in my sights with blood in the water. I’m starting to draw near on the first turn, and then try to pull a ricky bobby inside pass . The only problem is Rob also hugs the corner and we collide at the shoulder. I’m briefly stunned but given our huge mass differential, I can only think the Yerg got the worse end of the deal.  I then launch into an all-out headless chicken to the finish, crossing in 20:37. 7th overall, 1st in AG.

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Ok, so I would not have predicted a few months ago that Rob and I would be racing for a mid 20 minute 5k time. But I’ll take it at this point, especially with the way I was feeling at the start. The last mile had to be close to 6 flat, so that’s a good feeling, even if it was downhill. Still beat my terrible Springdale 5k from 3 weeks ago on a lot harder course.

In the overall, Nance scored his first overall win in recent times, staying with Daryl Hammond at the beginning and crushing the last mile for 18:34. Daryl won male masters at 51 years old in 18:52 – very strong. John Henis took 3rd at 49 years old, so it was apparently an all star masters race.  Devon Shirley had the easy win for the women. Female masters went to Jennifer Conrick. All the overall winners scored awesome gator head trophies, of which I was exceedingly jealous.

Age group honor roll: Yerg captured second in age group after our “epic” showdown to finish 2 minutes slower than our PRs. Anthony Hernandez was the age grouper mentioned above, and sure enough was in the 40-44, taking 2nd place. Ty Thomas broke 20 minutes on this tough course and still finished 2nd in a brutal 45-49. Mike Compton was a monkey on my back and rode it to a grandmasters PR for him in 21:12.  OG, Pete Poore and Leeds Barroll made up the rest of the 60-64 top 4. Alex Ponomarev was back and scored 1st in the 65-69. Arnold Floyd, Peter Mugglestone, Henry Holt and Rocky Soderberg were tops in a super competitive 70+. Henry is back running low 28’s despite being 6 years clear of the other youngsters.

Among the women,  Derek’s daughter Madelyn Gomez scorched the course in 24:43 at age 10. Wow. Team Gomez also scored with wife/mom Jamie , taking 2nd in the 35-39. Heather Mullenax took 1st in the 40-44. Joyce Welch and Julia Early had a battle for the ages, running together the whole race. Joyce took it by a step, though I’m thinking Julia may have let up. Aren’t these ladies competitive? I would give up half a lung to beat the Code (and have, on occasion). Joyce and Julia took the top 2 in the 45-49. Brigitte Smith came up from Aiken once again to claim the 65-69.

https://connect.garmin.com/modern/activity/886929815

https://www.runhard.org/files/results/swamp-results.pdf

 

 

 

 

Silver Fox 5k – Harbison State Forest – Irmo, SC

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The Silver Fox 5k has been around about 6 years, starting out as a cross country/trail race in Saluda Shoals. This year they switched the venue to Harbison State Forest, with a completely unique course. Proceeds go to benefit Dutch Fork’s cross country teams.

I’ve done most of the Silver Fox races, partly because its fun to do some trail races for a change, and partly because of some sense of loyalty to Dutch Fork – they are CRC supporters and my brother ran on their CC team in the mid 90’s.

I heard about the switch to Harbison and immediately fear overtook my dark, Sasquatchian heart. Ms. Harbison and I have a very difficult relationship. Besides leaving me bloodied on training runs, Harbison’s Xterra half marathon  left me shirtless and delirious on a hot summer day back in 2012. I also flopped across the finish and collapsed on the grass back in 2011 in the Xterra 5k, looking like hooked fish on a dock.

Its also been well documented that I officially suck on trails. I couldn’t really tell you what Harbison forest looks like, since I have to spend all my time staring at where to put my giant flippers so that I don’t bust my ass. That doesn’t always work either. At least I’m not like the Pale Beast. That dude can’t set foot on a trail without courting major trauma. Kenneth followed in the family tradition last year by crashing out and having to go to urgent care. I seem to recall a bloodied Colleen pic somewhere too. These guys were not meant for off-roading.

I had zero confidence going into this race. The Springdale 5k made me realize how much an injury layoff can trash your fitness. So what better than to throw yourself into a trail race that has left you bloodied and hurt before. Sounds legit.

I got there my customary hour early and looks like mostly kids, though we had a decent CRC contingent. Plex was there to try and capture the win for us old folks. Harry Strick, Mike Nance, Tom Beattie, Arnold Floyd, Henry Holt, Rocky Soderberg, Pete Poore, Stephanie Dukes, Mario and Jennifer Tudor, Brigitte Smith, Breck Bowen and Dina Mauldin are some of the tour regulars. I don’t know many of the kids, but Adam Bernthal, Bri Hartley,  and Margaret O’Toole  are some familiar faces. And no Brandenburg! Things were looking up.

Again, I have no idea what the course will be like. Dan Hartley , the new Silver Fox RD, posted the route but I get lost instantly in Harbison. He assured me the course was well marked. I did see it included part of Spider Woman II, so I knew that was no picnic.

The start was the usual for any of the Harbison races – up a steady gravel road to another parking lot, then into the woods. Pretty heavy traffic in the early going. Michael Nance was just ahead and some 30 something dude blasted by me towards the front. Whatever, dude – have at it.  I think the first mile was on the Eagle trail and connector towards the Midlands mountain and Spider woman, but dont hold me to it. I’m no Rick Stroud or Dean Schuster. I was just trying to hold a decent pace and not wipe out. There was a bottleneck at one point where a low wooden barrier guarded the entrance road against the trail. I jumped over it like a boss and got mocked by some teens nearby. Do not taunt the Sasquatch in his natural habitat. They got left for dead. I hit the first mile in 7:30. Not blazing, but given my less than optimal trail agility, I’ll take it. Soon afterward I found myself in the midst of a bunch of teenage girls – I think the Steger twins from Dutch fork and a few others. All I knew is that I was second in this pack and some tiny girl in front of me was going to get flattened if she made one false move. She was motoring but was sucking some serious wind, and eventually started to slow as we hit some major hills. I’m assuming some of this was Spider Woman, but hell if I know. This poor girl was probably being traumatized by having some hairy beast breathing down her neck, but damned if she was going to give up her position. These cross country girls do not play. I finally saw an opening and broke into the woods like a rabid albino bear, high stepping over all kinds of branches and junk and still had to cut this 80 pound maniac off. Between the conga line, hills and bushwhacking my own trail, mile 2 came back in 8:03. Yikes, better pick up the pace. At least some of the course seemed vaguely familiar now as we headed back home. I will say Dan had every turn very well marked, with a bunch of volunteers covering the really tricky sections. Harbison has been notorious for misdirects so I’m glad this was covered. Mile 3 was mostly on my own, but I kept seeing Nance up ahead. I figured this must mean I’m doing great because Mike’s been hitting low 18’s most of the summer with the Team Utopia training. And I was slowly reeling him in. Especially when he hit Schuster hill, site of the epic duel in the woods from Make my Day earlier this year. But this time it was not to be. Somebody blew my stealth cover at the top of the hill and Nance kicked it in once we hit the flat tree-lined trail section afterward. Finally we hit the open field finish, with a short track like lap before hitting the chute. I rolled in at 23:39.

I thought I had placed pretty high, but it turns out all the kids were so far ahead I didn’t see them. Ended up  19th overall, though 5th if you only consider people able to legally drink a beer. And first in age group!  I thought I had masters wrapped up, but damned if Bob Daley didn’t show up and whip my tail. Bob crushed a sub 19 at Sweat it Out and foiled my masters points there too. Oh, and Mike ran the headlamp loop with the Harbison crew at 5:30 am, so he was over 9 miles in at the start. And,  “wasn’t trying that hard”. Damn you, Nance. And one more ego hit – the girl holding me off for a mile was 11 years old, and crying at the finish.

Plex took home the glory for the “old guys”,  beating Alex Chalgren and Zachary Freeman. Bri Hartley took home the glory for the girls, with some girl pretending to be Anna Jenkins winning 2nd. Mia Perry won third – she must have been in the group drafting in my wake in mile 2.

In the age groups, Nance and Mario Tudor went 1-2 in the 35-39. Bob Daley easily won the 45-49. Tom Beattie won the 50-54 by showing up. Pete Poore and Harry Strick claimed the 60-64. Arnold Floyd, Henry Holt and Rocky Soderberg swept the 70+. Brie McGrivevy took the 40-44 but paid for it with a Harbison induced avulsion fracture. Sorry Brie, at least you gave Tom Beattie a scare. Brigitte Smith won the 65-69.

https://connect.garmin.com/modern/activity/868064140

https://www.runhard.org/files/results/harbison-overall.pdf

 

Springdale at Sunrise 5k – Camden, SC – 8/8/15

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The Springdale 5k is back again in its 7th year, this time held in the streets surrounding the Springdale racetrack in Camden, SC. I’ve missed a few Springdales here and there, since its held in the summer during prime vacation time. This year I was back from Orlando, having spent much of my life savings at Universal Studios and Legoland, so I was free to jump in this race.

I was actually part of the inaugural race back in 2009. Then it was held at sunset, and on the actual horsetrack. You could see the whole race unfold from the stands, and they followed the race with music, food and beer. Why they strayed from this amazing concept is beyond me, but I will say the original race was absolutely brutal. Ninety four degrees, and the entire course was ankle-length grass. The race was notable for one of the most epic blue shoe finishes of all time – a full-on headless chicken, lung-bursting surge to nip an unsuspecting Chad Long at the finish line. All of this to secure a blazing 23:40 something. I don’t even think I got an age group for it. Strictly running captured an 8 photo montage of the incident, each frame capturing a unique and seemingly progessively uglier race face. Sadly, these pics have been lost to history forever, though I was able to pull up the results from milesplit.   http://sc.milesplit.com/meets/55153/results/93778

I think 2009 is my only time doing this race. All the other years I was either on vacation or recovering from major trauma. A blog check shows I did show up in 2011 to watch with a 6 pack of Yeungling  in my trunk. Always keeping it classy.

So this would be my first 5k since the Sweat it Out in early June. I had been training like a beast most of the spring, culminating in the PR 18:39 at the Blythewood 5k in April, and then all the wheels started coming off.  I got a nagging shin splint in my left shin due to my Hawaii toe and then my right foot decided it wanted to get in on the action and get some plantar fasciitis. Awesome. I went several weeks barely running at all. I did hit the pool like a beast and do some cycling and weights, but I only started back run training in the past couple of weeks. Serial vacations to IOP, New York and Orlando in July didnt help the comeback any either. Or my financial stability, but that is another matter.

All of this to say is that this was not going to be pretty. No long runs, no speed work, and minimal mileage basically all summer. I had no idea what to expect and no clue as how to pace. But I had to start back somewhere.

Surprisingly, Camden is only about 30 minutes from my house, so I got to the race in plenty of time. Not a huge crowd but a bunch of the CRC regulars were on hand, since this was a Tour race. Columbia had the 811 5k with $8.11 registration, so I’m sure that cut down on the turnout. Team Utopia teammate Jim Williams was on hand. Strictly brought out their elite squad with Jonathan Kinsey, Plexico, both Brandenburgs and Coach B himself. Jennifer Reeves, Parker Roof, Rocky Soderberg, Arnold Floyd, Tom Beattie, Henry Holt, Sue Porter, Brigitte Smith were some of the Tour veterans. Whitney Keen, Heather Costello, Kara Clyburn, Garrick Douglas, Andrew Lipps, Sharon Cole and Chad and Betsy Long were familiar faces from the Elgin/Lugoff/Camden contingent. Trophy showed up to watch and take over my photo duties, though I had already told him this would be a prime chance to maybe score a rare Blue Shoes victory for him. Past results suggest that I must narrowly cheat death and have major orthopedic trauma for him to have a chance, though. But, it seems he’s been slacker than me this summer.

I’d like to say I scouted out this course and developed a race strategy but I did absolutely nothing of the sort. I did briefly look at the course video and saw that it was all roads this year, though it was impossible to see elevation changes. I lined up second row behind the SR Red Storm in front of me and we were off. It felt weird to run fast again since I basically had been pulling 9-10 minute pace for most of July, just trying to avoid re-injury.  The front pack left me for dead immediately and I settled into a no-man’s land with Whitney up ahead and Garrick just behind me. The first mile, at the time, seemed pretty flat, though in actuality it was a gradual downhill. Since Brandenburg and Bedenbaugh were so far ahead I figured I was going insanely slow, though I was very pleased to get a 6:27 back for mile 1. This pace is ingrained in my brain ever since I tried to break 20 minutes for a year and a half.  And hey, this didn’t feel too bad, right? Let’s pick it up a bit. Garrick had pulled up beside me but I surged forward and ran by myself in mile 2. The first half of mile 2 stayed OK…the second half, not so much. Lungs and legs did not like the surge. I backed it down a bit. The relatively cool morning suddenly didn’t feel so cool anymore. I suddenly saw the 2 mile mark and got back another 6:27 on the Garmin. OK, so 20 minute flat pace. Just hold it here and maybe you can blue shoe a finish to get a 19 something. Um… wrong answer. Suddenly the course turns uphill in mile 3 and everything goes epically to crap in a hurry. I’m sucking wind and the legs turn to cinder blocks. I’m trying to power up the hill but its one of those long gradual ones and it’s just crushing my very soul. A half mile from the finish Garrick blows by me and I’ve got nothing to respond. Tank is pinned on “E”. The last bit is pretty much a blur. Still uphill, hanging on for dear life and begging for the finish line. Finally we hit the last turn and I can’t bear to look at my Garmin (a very ugly 6:55 positive split). I attempt a feeble kick to the finish with the clock already in the 20’s, desperate for the pain to end and almost as desperate not to get a 21. I call trophy “Blackjack” every time he gets slack and fades into the 21’s and it would be too much to bear to get blackjacked myself (especially with him photodocumenting the whole thing). Luckily I spare myself at least some shame and cross in 20:40.

Wow. I haven’t felt that bad in a 5k in a long, long time. There’s definitely a lot of engine work to be done, but hopefully it will come back quickly. Some had the course a little long, but mine was 3.13. I did take solace in winning the 40-44 age group, though its kind of a hollow victory when 49 year old JB, 52 year old Coach B and 45 year old Whitney all whip your tail in masters.

Jonathan Kinsey crushed the competition in this race, blazing a 16:26, with Plex capturing 2nd. Socastee CC runner Nicholas Lefever took 3rd. Among the women, Heather Costello endured a Blue shoe-esque finish by Whitney but still easily won. Sharon Cole took 2nd and Martie Gail McCallum 3rd.

Barbara Brandenburg took home 1st female masters followed by Colleen Reed and Sherry Blizzard. The male masters punks are listed above. In the age groups, Whitney’s son Robert won 2nd in the 11-14, while daughter Julia also won 2nd in the 15-19. Parker Roof got shamed an old man with a resting heart rate of 36 but still got 2nd in the 15-19 guys. Garrick took home the 30-34. Kara Clyburn won the 35-39. Chad Long got blue shoed again by some kid but managed 3rd in the 40-44. Wife Betsy scored 2nd in the women’s 40-44. J-Reeves scored a 3rd in the 45-49. In the 50-54, Tom Beattie claimed 2nd and Andrew Lipps 3rd. Jim Williams easily took the 55-59. Sue Porter was champ of the female 55-59. Brigitte Smith won the 65-69, while Arnold Floyd, Henry Holt and Rocky Soderberg swept the 70+.

http://racesonline.com/events/springdale-5k/results/2015

 

 

 

 

 

Tom Hoskins Memorial Sprint Triathlon – Irmo, SC – 7/25/15

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Tom Hoskins is a sprint tri put on by Erin Roof and the Northwest YMCA in Irmo, which serves to memorialize a man killed in a car-on-bike accident during a charity ride in 2007. The tri is a 350 yard pool swim, 14 mile bike and 5k run.

This is triathlon number four for me. Although my ineptitude in this sport has been thoroughly documented, somehow I keep coming back for more. Last year I was challenged (shamed?) into doing the duathlon at this event by Jennifer “Tenacious J” Hill. I endured weeks of online verbal abuse, which only served to motivate me to get my ass on the bike and train like a madman. It wasn’t pretty, but my 4 second edge over the J on the bike will be a virtual trophy I will cherish for years.

Fast forward a year, and I decided to take the plunge (literally) and go for the whole tri. I signed up like 3 months ago and said I’d train hard. I usually say/think things like this while drinking a beer in front of a computer.

So let’s examine my training. I did swim like a maniac. The reason for this? Pure, unadulterated, fear. The trauma wreaked upon me by the 2012 downtown tri still haunts my soul. 196th in the pool out of 200. I can’t imagine what those 4 pitiful souls did because I swam 75 meters and mostly pool walked the rest…while making swim-like motions with my arms for fear of being DQ’d. Not a proud moment. This summer I swam about 3 times a week for most of the summer, topping out at a mile. This is probably what Wes Spratt does as a warmup, but for me its like the Western States of swimming. I figured I’d be OK in the water.

The bike, not so much. The key thing for me was finally getting a bike that fit (thanks Henry at Summit cycles), so I no longer had to pedal furiously like an overgrown circus monkey every time I went out for a ride. Going out for a ride, unfortunately, was basically about 10 weekend excursions, most of which were in the 20 mile range. I was aided by the fact I had to chase Ken “The Pale Beast” Vowles most of those times. The dude has been run-injured for months so he’s fashioned himself into a steroid-free Lance Armstrong in the interim. He literally would have to loop back to allow me to catch up. Trophy joined us a few times so we could at least be slow together.

Oh, and the run. After training like crazy in the spring, my legs decided to veto the summer. Plantar, shin splints and other fun stuff. Sarah Allers helped sort out my wrecked muscles though, and I’ve been back doing around 25-30 miles per week (well off my 40-45 for much of the last year). So not in the best run shape, but obviously my strength over the other two disciplines. The key would be to not destroy my self in the swim-bike (i.e. Tri the Midlands) so I could unleash the secret power on the 5k course.

I got there super early to the Northewest Y in Irmo. Super scared. Just the sight of the pool makes my stomach churn. Did I mention my new pearl izumi tri suit? It was awesome. Because what’s better than being an Albino Sasquatch than an Albino Sasquatch covered in spandex. Elephant seal-esque. But hopefully it would speed up my woefully slow transition times, which I had dutifully practiced…1 time at Tri the Midlands. Lots of familiar faces. Jess Maki got the unenviable job of marking up the paleness. Fellow Strictly peeps Jordan Lybrand and Ryan Plexico were doing the duathlon. Brian Clyburn was also on board to do the du again – he crushed me last year when I had no idea what a beast he is on the bike. Jennifer Reeves also was trying the duathlon again after some less than confidence building pool walksies in her tri training. Ken Lowden was there to volunteer with wife Patti doing the tri. Alan Humphries, Pam Inman, Randy Hrechko, April Hutto, Marlena Crovatt-Bagwell, Liz Locke, Pam and Mike Griffin, Brie McGrievy, Ray Renner, Paul Laymon, Lisa Smarr, Missy Caughman, Sharon Sherbourne, Chad Shivar, May Vokaty and Hou-Yin Chang were there. Tenacious J brought husband Jeff along this time. She was doing the tri also, but swore she was just doing it for fun. Fun? There is no “fun” in triathlon! Robbie “the OG” McLendon was also on board – it was great seeing him after way too long.

When we lined up for the swim, I was in a mild panic. Number 38 out of almost 200? Surely I must have miscalculated my swim seed time. Damn that beer. Oh well, too late now. The swim looked frighteningly like the 2012 downtown tri, which was my only other pool “swim”.  350 meters, six of the lanes with 2 way traffic. At least it was going to be short. April and Randy were right ahead of me.  They were letting people go every 5-10 seconds, thankfully from a point already in the pool. As a swim team parent, I had seen too many kids dive in off the starting boards and lose their goggles, slowing them down and causing some to cry. At least being a tearful, red-eyed mess wouldn’t shame me any more than my previous tri performances.

The starter tells me to go and I start motoring like Sister Christian. I hit the first wall like an olympic 50 meter freestyle, though a lot slower and less graceful. I can’t flip turn to save my life ( I literally asked my 9 and 11 year old to teach me yesterday), so I opt for the touch, duck under the lane line and kick off the wall approach.  Enter the washing machine on spin cycle. I power through the next few laps, freaking out with each near miss of the swimmer coming at me just inches away. I actually pass a couple of people. Things start to calm down a bit towards the latter half and I sneak a look behind me and see nobody. A second later I get a wicked punch to the chest which sends me reeling to the side. Apparently I had drifted to the left and that was April’s only defense against the ocean liner headed straight toward her. She packs a mean right hook, FYI. I then make a point to hug the lane line. I’m on April’s heels by the end but she kicks it in and I suddenly realize we have broken free into the last lane, which is one-way. I see April exit and I look up and see Ken Lowden encircled in light, like an angel from above, guiding me out of the darkness.  I’m half delirious from swimming so hard (I did all my training at medium effort)  and jog towards the transition area. Can’t believe I didn’t get passed. Swim split: 6:30.

My kick-drum heart and oxygen-deprived brain make my usual transition clumsiness even worse. Thankfully my Albino elephant seal tri suit means I don’t have to struggle with a shirt. Helmet on, bike shoes strapped, a painfully long pause to make sure I haven’t forgot anything, and I’m off. (T1 =1:23)

The bike is a simple 6+ mile out and back on Kennerly road, totaling close to 14 miles. It feels great to be out of the water, but its at least a mile before I can get the whole lungs/heart combo from beating out of my chest. I rode the course exactly zero times this year, so I’m trying to recall everything from 2014. All I remember are hills, lots of them. Sure enough, the course is rocking and rolling right away. I pass Randy and  a handful of others in the first 3 miles. Things feel pretty good.  I start struggling a bit in mile 5 and 6 as the fatigue starts and I’m still headed away from the finish. It doesn’t help that a 50 year old Clydesdale blows by me right before the turnaround.  On my out, I see Plexico, Jordan and Clyburn in a tight race for the du. It’s a nice psychological boost to hit the turnaround at Freshly Mill, and I start picking up the pace after negotiating the still awkward dance of using my water bottle. The way back has some tough climbs, but its so much easier than the circus monkey bike from last year. With about 3 miles to go , I actually feel better and enter a strange zone where everything seems to flow smoothly. I want to really crush it towards the finish but I lay off, remembering how fried I was on the Tri the Midlands run. I cruise into T2, somehow only getting passed by the one guy.  Bike Split: 42:39

I power fumble through T2 as WLTX’s camera sits right there capturing the whole thing. I try to look like I know what I’m doing, but I keep having to do mental checks that I’m forgetting something. I notice its getting brutally hot and sunny (80’s) so I remember to put on my sunglasses this time (totally forgot in T1) and hat.  (T2=1:06)

The run is a shortish 5k through an adjacent neighborhood, changed from previous years due to construction. I hadn’t checked it out before, but I was just hoping it was nicer than the mountain climb of the Pumpkin Run course they usually use. About a half mile in I realize I don’t have my bib belt on, but I’m hoping they are OK with the 38 written all over my body. The run course is full of twists and turns. Plenty of hills, to be sure, but at least they are broken up. I am actually able to run a decent pace this time, which is a refreshing change from my satan’s anus slog from hell at Tri the midlands. I’m passing people left and right and feeling generally good about myself until I hear footsteps. Damn – I know its gotta be Randy. Sure enough he passes me and I try to latch on behind him. Not really working – he’s going too fast and I’m too afraid to push it. Just too hot and without my Garmin (left on bike) I’m flying blind as far as distance. They did have mile markers, which was nice. I keep Randy in sight and start trying to kick it in after the 2 mile mark. I make up some ground, but he’s sniffing the finish too and hold me off. Finally, I break into the oven of the YMCA parking lot and go full headless chicken into the finish area. Thankfully guardian angel Ken is there to tell me not to trip over the speed bump, which I probably would have done in my delirium. I’m thrilled to see 1:16 on the clock and I sprint to make sure I get in under 1:17.  (run split 20:04)

After some serious rehydration and trying to cool down I go and check the results. I have no idea how I did. I figured significantly better than Tri the midlands, which I did in 1:26 with a longer swim (open water 500 vs  pool 350) but similar bike and run. I can’t find myself on the results initially but suddenly I stop and just stare. 8th overall?? I’ve never been in the top 30 much less the top 10 – but sure enough it all matches up. Actual time was 1:11:44. Holy crap. 2nd in age group, too. Never been close before. I’m as giddy as a schoolgirl. Nice coffee cup bling and I go home a very happy man.

In the tri overall, 17 year old Miles Fowler crushed the field in 58 minutes for the win. Paul Laymon blazed on the bike and run to take 2nd. Tim Scott took third.  Among the women, Jen Kryzanowski took home the win, with SR’s Liz Locke in second and Lisa Powell third.

In the age groups, Randy took 2nd in the 45-49, 11th overall with a 19:41 run split. Marlena Crovatt-Bagwell finished 3rd in the 50-54 and 28th overall. Sandra Ricciuto took 2nd in the 45-49. Mike Griffin placed 3rd in the 55-59. The OG rocked a 20:24 run and placed 1st in the 60-64. Lisa Smarr took 3rd in the 55-59. Patti Lowden finished 2nd in the 65-69.

Clydesdale was won by Marty Baltzegar, who I believe was the guy who took me down on the bike. Parker Roof anchored the winning relay team, who eked out a win by 20 minutes. Ryan Plexico raced a very nice 41 minute bike split on virtually no training and won the duathlon. I have to give major props to my Palmetto 200 captain Brian Clyburn. His blazing 40 minute bike split enabled him to edge Jordan Lybrand (who absolutely crushed the run segments) for 3rd.

http://onthemarksports.com/results/2015-tom-hoskins-triathlon-results/#/results::1438115863478

 

 

 

 

Tri the Midlands – Lake Carolina – Columbia, SC – 6/20/15

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Tri the Midlands is a sprint tri (500 m open water swim, 14 mi bike, 3.1 mi run) put on by Set Up Events in the Lake Carolina neighborhood.

First, it should be known that I am not a triathlete. But racing options start drying up in the summer and somehow I get the ridiculous, grandiose idea that I can wing a tri and still do well. You’d think I’d have learned. The Downtown triathlon in 2012, my maiden attempt at a swim-bike-run event, was such an epic failure that I still get crap about it. I’m pretty sure Brandenburg and Wes Spratt have my T1 shame photo as the background on their computer screen. For the uninitiated, here it is:

 

trishame

 

That’s me, sitting down, more exhausted than I’ve ever been at any athletic event before or since. This after a “brutal” 500 meter pool swim. I use the term “swim” loosely, since I pool walked about 75 percent of it. Somehow  I thought I could swim with absolutely zero training. A word of advice: I wouldn’t recommend it.

That same year, I decided to try and earn back a shred of triathlon dignity by jumping into this event. I trained for the swim like a man possessed, because this being an open water swim, I’m pretty sure I couldn’t walk it. That time I plowed ahead as hard as I could go…towards the wrong buoy. I almost panicked and had to be rescued (ask Diesel for his story) but I managed to correct and finish the swim. I even placed 2nd novice and Blue Shoed Trophy after he passed me on the bike. I can’t thank Greg Howell enough for capturing that moment for posterity:

trityler

But all of that was 3 years and one major trauma ago. I did do the Tom Hoskins duathlon last year, and some beer fueled night a couple of months ago I decided to go all in for the tri this time. That’s in July. And I guess some other equally beer influenced decision 2 weeks ago, I decided to jump into Tri the Midlands again to see how my “training” was going. Apparently I need to stay away from computers while drinking. Training needs air quotes too, since I had officially done 4 bike rides in June, only one over 10 miles. My swimming amounted to about 5 times in the pool, topping out at about 42 lengths (about 1000m).  But hey, my grandiosity knows no bounds, so I was going to crush this, right? Plus, I finally made the plunge and procured myself a 58 cm bike (Felt Z95) that actually fit (my old one was a 54 cm) – thanks to Henry Mandrell at Summit cycles. I was surely going to be Craig Alexander in no time.

I showed up to Lake Carolina about an hour ahead of time. I had originally planned to be 90 minutes early, but I kept forgetting stuff and generally being a total noob. I ripped the laces out of my blue shoes to replace them with elastic ones, only to break the elastic laces and be totally screwed. I brought my huge orange hokas as an emergency backup. The Code was already on site to spectate presumably because my tri attempts are such high comedy. The parking is like a half mile from the set up area so I had to go over everything in my mind several times to make sure I didn’t leave anything. Darrell offered to help with the gear transport – I think they call this a “sherpa” in tri speak, but I just prefer “bucket bitch”, so that was his new title.

The transition area was pretty packed. Of course, thanks to both of us signing up last second yesterday, the Pale Beast and I got side by side set up areeas. The battle of the Paleness was on. I had toyed with the idea of signing up as novice again (this is my third tri and first since 2012) or even better “masters clydesdale” but I figured the former was kind of weak and I couldn’t fudge 25 pounds to be 220 (running races usually do 200). So age group it was, complete with a periwinkle blue swim cap. So manly.

There were a fair amount of familiar faces. Trophy was on hand to photodocument all the whiteness. I saw Laura and Greg Howell for the first time in forever, which was nice. Ken Lowden and the Howells were helping man the boat/SUP/kayak brigade meant to keep us clueless swimming noobs safe. Eternally grateful for that. J Reeves, Erika Burgess and Pam Griffin were volunteering. Both Brandenburgs, Rob Weber, George Smith, Ilia, Paul Laymon, Wendy Hart, Missy Caughman, Healther Alexander, Keith Sikes, Les Boan, Tenacious J Hill, Patti Lowden, Sandra Ricciuto, April Hutto, Pat Norcia, Kristin Cattieu and the Vokatys were some familiar faces. Aubrey Johnson and Angel were doing the relay. Wes Spratt had called me out about not registering and Tom Beattie was thinking I might be able to beat him, though Tom is unaware of how bad I suck in the swim-bike area. I would have to be less than 5 minutes behind at the start of the run to catch him. Hey, maybe I can do that?

THE SWIM-500 meters

We all line up for the start on the shore and I’m nervous as hell. Damn that buoy looks far off. I squirm up to the front to see the whole course and make  ABSOLUTELY SURE I don’t sight towards the wrong buoy this time. Set Up starts playing what seems to be their anthem, Eminem’s “Lose Yourself”. I think it’s supposed to make you fired up but all it does is about send me into a panic. Open athletes go first, followed by the under 40 men’s age groups 3 minutes later. All the “old men” are next, which now includes me, complete with periwinkle swim cap crushing my oversized brain. The water is disgustingly warm. Total bathtub, and murky as hell. I look around and there are a lot of people. Novice had like 15 in 2012, there’s got to be 30+ in the age group wave. The start is complete mayhem. I was dumb for being right in the center, and suddenly I’m getting beat up left and right. First a hand to my head, a couple of kicks, then some dude slides right over me. WTF?? Lots of warm masters man on man action. Not exactly my thing, but at least I know why Brandenburg loves this stuff.  I’m having trouble trying to get into any rhythm, and it turns out Lake Carolina doesnt have lane markers and a black stripe on the bottom. I’m sucking in a lot of wonderful bacteria-free Lake Carolina  water and having to dog paddle at times to not grab feet or go off course. About halfway to buoy 1 I abandon any hope of my usual swim pattern and just breathe with every stroke. It actually gets me free of the pack and I plow ahead through the warm murk.  Suddenly I look up and I’ve managed to get right at the buoy, mostly by blind luck. It’s pretty scary to be out this far, remembering my downtown tri nightmare and definitely violating everything that early 80’s Sallie McDonald ever told me about water safety. I’m still breathing too hard but at least I’m free of the Marquis de Sade bathtub scene from earlier. Somehow I hit the tangent of the 2nd buoy and I start picking up the pace towards home. I’m actually catching some of the royal blue young dudes. Geez, these guys must be really slow. One of my fellow periwinkle caps has adopted some power breaststroke just ahead to my left. I stop sighting and just follow him, since I figure he sees the shore, and my noodle armed freestyle isn’t much faster. I’m totally euphoric when I take a stroke and hit mud. The great white whale has been beached!  I spring towards the shore and all these guys are freaking walking. Dudes, this is a race isn’t it? I break free and do my best spandexed pants barefoot jog about 50 meters to the transition area. Trophy and Julia Early make sure to capture all the paleness for posterity. I’m just glad to have survived, though Trophy informs me the Beast is just ahead. (Swim split 12:14 )

Sure enough, Ken is power fumbling through the swim-bike transition and I join him in the chaos. I throw on a shirt to avoid blinding passers-by and do a thoroughly awkward and slow shoe change. I throw the megamind helmet on and do my stiff bike-cleat jog out of T1. At least I can stand upright next to my bike now instead of hunched over. (2:06)

THE BIKE – 14 miles

Thanks to not doing an extra 100 meters of swim this time and having a bike that fits, I tear out onto the bike course like a man possessed. Oh yeah, these suckers are going down. This lasts maybe one mile until our first incline, when it suddenly dawns on me that I havent even done 50 miles of total bike training in a year’s time. Jeff does more than that on a bad DAY. A couple of miles in I manage to pass some people and I;m feeling pretty good. Pretty good, until Kristin comes whizzing by like I’m standing still. WTF? I guess it pays to actually train on the bike. On Kelly Mill road, I can actually see the Pale Beast up ahead, so maybe I can catch him. No matter that he’s been bike training while being run-injured and left me and Trophy for dead on our last group ride. I can take him! Or not. A big incline on Addams rd (see Blythewood labor day 5k 2012) sucks some energy and I realize I maybe got a little too frisky out of the gate. Langford road has some nice flats and downhills, but I know what is to come. Sure enough, the Langford section ends with 2 nasty inclines that I’m probably barely doing 10 mph on. I do manage to pass a Clydesdalish guy and a woman that had both passed me earlier. Twenty five mile creek rd is awesomely downhill so I start crushing it in the big ring pretty hard. Oh yeah, I am the man. And then I get re-passed by Clydesdale guy, and then an Athena-ish woman… 2 of them actually. And Ken is no longer visible. So much for pride. 25 mile creek ends with a brutal wall like hill and I reclaim a small sliver of dignity by passing Mr. Clydesdale yet again. Not the two Athenas though – those girls have destroyed me. Back on Kelly Mill, I know I’m only a couple of miles from the bike finish. One problem – stick a fork in me, because I’m done. The heat has come out with a vengeance (80’s) and I start hating life pretty quick. There’s a long slow incline on Kelly Mill and my legs are complete jello. I contemplate small ringing it on this really weak hill but my pride wont let me. What’s worse is that I have yet to develop the cyclist’s iron crotch, and my nether regions are crying out for me to stop the torture. I’m standing up in the saddle to get some blood flow back to the naughty bits and moaning like a shot elephant trying to power through the last few inclines in Lake Carolina. Thankfully no one passes me during this ugly display. Maybe they were just scared.

I’m eternally grateful to be done with the bike pulling into T2. Vowles has already  left the building. I throw on my Hokas, which are easy to lace up. I neglected to think about the fact they weigh twice as much as my racers. Between the fidlding around and taking my Garmin off the bike, I transition like somebody’s grandma.

THE RUN 3.1 miles

I hit the run course the same time as April Hutto, and I try to impart some encouraging words, but then I realize we are treading on the surface of the sun. Or an oven, or whatever extremely hot metaphor you want to use. It’s probably 85 degrees, but the internal furnace I built up by overextending myself on the bike has left me dangerously close to a meltdown. I run by my friend’s Ryan’s house and scare the hell out of his 4 year old son who is wondering what freak out there knows his name. I’ve likened the run to bike transition as jogging while 2 cobras bite you simultaneously on each ass cheek. Thankfully, the new bike has made this considerably better, maybe just vipers or some other lower grade snake. Still, I am just trotting. Here I am, finally at the part I’m supposed to be good at, and I’m royally sucking. The heat has me totally paralyzed, and here we go up another hill out of Harborside (see Harborside Lights 5k 2013).  The Code and Colleen are there trying to be supportive, shouting out encouraging words while giving me “what the hell is wrong with him?” looks. A finisher is being announced as I start my 5k slog and I ‘ve never wanted to be “Michael Frassica from Irmo”so bad. But hey, even my power jog is letting me pass people because it is a total war zone out there. No shade, sun beating down like satan’s anus. Lots of walksies even a half mile into this. After the climb out of Harborside, there’s a nice long downhill. Erika is there at the water stop and I take hers and another cup and do a double chug. I’m maybe doing 7:30 pace on the downhill – between the furnace-like conditions and my general lack of motivation (i.e. no trophies) I just can’t fathom going any faster. I even get chicked by a woman in green and can’t respond.  I see Angel coming back towards home and then Kristin, who not only has killed me on the bike but is doing the same on the run. Kudos to her. The worst part of this course is Mt. Carolina – a towering hill right smack in the middle of the 3.1 that is annually the leading cause of walksies in the Columbia area. I start the miserable slog up this mountain and the walksie voices are really screaming, made worse by seeing Vowles trundling downhill and being completely uncatchable at this point. Damn that Beast.  I finally reach the summit of this monster pulling like 10 minute pace, but I can’t walk now with J Reeves herself managing the water station (who I constantly rag about 5 k walking). I let gravity take over on the way down, just doing nothing but falling down this hill. I’m really good at that, trust me. That nice long downhill after Harborside is now that not-so-nice climb back up. The heat is out of control. I manage to pass Barb Brandenburg on the hill less than a mile to the finish. I feel really good about this pass until I realize she started three minutes behind me. I finally hit Harborside again and I give it all I can in the last quarter mile or so, which is probably the only time I went under 7 minute pace for the whole run. I see the clock heading towards 1:33 and I put the jets on to cross in 1:32:51, or 1:26:51 corrected for my wave. 6th in age group.

OK, so triathlons are definitely a humbling experience. I’m happy with improving my swim time by a minute and bike by two minutes (from the 2012 event) with minimal training. The only problem is that the effort to do that produced a world of suckage on the run (3 minutes slower). I have this sneaking suspicion it might help to swim and bike more. Novel concept. Oh, and I desperately need to transition better. That’s probably because I use them more as rest zones and go about them like a grandpa changing into his slippers to go get the Sunday paper.

I don’t know a lot of tri peeps but here are some of the names I recognize. Brandenburg was a beast of course and won 1st male masters and 3rd overall. 34 minutes on the bike, jeezus H.  60 year old Jeff Allums placed 5th overall and won the 60-64. Wow. Michael Frassica placed 3rd male masters. Jennifer Kryzanowski placed 2nd open female and Janice Addison took home first in female masters. Kristin ran 21 minutes and change for the 6th fastest run time overall and had the 2nd fastest women’s total time, winning the 35-39. Wendy Hart took 3rd in the 40-44, while Barb Brandenburg won the 45-49 and yes, beat me by over 2 minutes. Lisa Powell took 1st in the 50-54 and Paul Laymon took 2nd on the men’s side. I did manage to beat Wes Spratt by 5 minutes on the run, though perhaps that just underscores his blue shoe destruction on the swim/bike, beating me by almost 6 minutes overall. He took 2nd in the 55-59 for his efforts. Patti Lowden and Shawn Chillag were champions of the 65-69. Ilia finished 2nd overall Athena and Pat Norcia won the aquabike, overtaking Tom Syfert with a blazing 38 minute bike split.

http://www.setupevents.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=event_results&id=4587

 

 

 

Sweat it Out 5k – Columbia, SC – 6/6/15

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The Sweat it Out 5k is a new event this year that goes to benefit the National Foundation of Ectodermal Dysplasias, genetic conditions that, among other problems, make those afflicted unable to sweat. A local family, the Dukes, have a son, Nicholas, with Hypohydriotic Ectodermal Dysplasia. He was the inspiration behind the event and actually designed the race shirt. One of our own, Shannon Iriel, was race directing, so I was definitely in to help support a fellow runner and a good cause.

I came in to this race with pretty much zero confidence. Ever since I tweaked my back about a month ago, I’ve been riding the injury train and have probably put in half the miles I usually do. Run Red Bank was my first race in a few weeks, and even that wasn’t at full effort.

But I decided to give it a go this time. I have been pain free for a couple of weeks, and I was back to at least about 70 percent of my usual 40-45 miles per week. It would probably help to start back with the morning training routine, but I haven’t been able to drag my butt out of bed recently. My punishment: afternoon runs in the Columbia summer inferno. Famously hot, indeed.

Speaking of getting up early, this race was at 7 am to avoid the heat. I got there about 45 minutes ahead of time and its impressive how many people showed up for this first time race. It was great to see so many Columbia Running Club peeps out to support one of their own. Of course, CRC peeps are inversely proportional to the degree of trophy hunting. This place was crawling with beasts. Kenzie Riddle, MC Cox, Heather Brumbach, Anna Jenkins and Linn Hall made for one of the strongest female fields I have seen in a while. The Yerg, Angel, Jeff Godby, and Adam Bernthal meant there’d be a big pack in the 18-19 minute range. Larry Bates,  Wayne Shuler, Leeds Barroll, Rocky, Henry Holt, Ponomarev, Lisa and Jonathan King, Mike Compton, Michael Jensen, Tom Beattie, Arnold Floyd, Colleen Vowles, Gasque, Pete, Jessica Workman, Peter Mugglestone, Ken Lowden, Hou Yin Chang and the Tanner family (minus Ray) were some of the familiar faces. The CODE was out for support but can’t race yet. Tom tried to fool me into a Brandenburg sighting, but mercifully tri season has begun and he was nowhere to be found.

I had no idea about this course. Ken and Tom were telling me it was fairly flat with a hill near mile 2. The only race I ever ran in this neighborhood (near Hammond Academy behind the VA) was the 2009 Strides for Health at the med school, which was almost all flat, so I had my fingers crossed. I was going to run this pretty hard, but I also needed to factor in the heat and being off my training.

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Little Nicholas did the start, and we were off. With all the beasts, it was blazing. Some unknown kid took off like a maniac and I never saw him again. There were a bunch of other younger kids tearing out of the gate like it was an Olympic 100m. Of course they stopped a quarter mile in and  almost got run over by a pale, 40 year old bus. Although the cardio involved in running 5k pace was like a kick to the chest, the legs were actually loving the speed. I swear I get injured more often doing my slow runs. Godby is on my back like a monkey, and I figure we are pretty even with him in the middle of marathon training (Grandma’s marathon in Duluth, MN). He was weakened, however, by having to deal with what I sweat out in the bathroom pre-race. Must fight him off for masters! Speaking of masters, a 40ish dude comes into the picture in mile 1 and passes both of us. I’m not sure who he is, but 12 year old Adam Bernthal told me he was on a quest to beat his dad today, so this is probably him. I point him out to Godby to make sure we are aware of a fellow old dude in our midst. First mile is pretty much flat, Garmin spits out a 6:12, which is about where I want to be.  I’m running in a pack with Heather Brumbach, Adam and Godby. The senior Bernthal, Angel, MC and Yerg are just up ahead. In the next half mile I manage to surge ahead basically maintaining the same pace. Feels OK – the heat/humidity are definitely a factor, but I feel way better than my battle with Brandenburg at the JROTC 5k a month ago, where I went out in 5:50 something and wanted to die the rest of the way. We finish an out and back loop and head back out on the road (Galway) we were on earlier. With my 5k race brain, I see some larger buildings up ahead and I figure its the last out and back before we turn around to head back home. Um, not so much. Turns out it was Hammond Academy, which I’ve known about most of my life but never seen in person. The first feelings of death start to creep in as I see we are heading out again on the last out-and-back loop to the right on Saye Cut. Code is out there spectating, probably rooting for people to take me down.

On the way out I can tell we are going slightly downhill, so I guess we will be climbing this on the way back. It’s really nothing – about what amounts to a hill in Shandon.  As we near the turnaround I am surprised to be closing in fast on Yerger. Dude ran a PR 18:12 on the track last week so I guess he’s not feeling it. I pass him and Adam as we hit the turnaround cone. Mile 2 comes back with an identical 6:12. I see Godby, Linn and Heather right behind me as I start the trek back home. I’m trying to kick it in some but the slight uphill and heat/humidity are taking their toll. Code pops up again and is talking trash. I can’t really respond because the wind suckage has begun in earnest.  Finally turning back on Galway is a relief because I know we’re getting closer to the finish. I had done a warmup before the race and knew I could unleash the hounds as soon as I reached Meadowfield Elementary. It seemed to take forever, and plus there is a fairly significant incline right before the school that I somehow totally missed. Surprisingly, Angel and MC are right ahead and I can even still see Kenzie. I motor up the hill to Meadowfield, take a couple of deep breaths and fire up the blue shoes. I’m closing in fast on Angel, who I can tell is not kicking it in. Oh well, I’ll take what I can get. I blast it into overdrive as we turn on to Olde Knight and I catch Angel right at the parking lot for the park. MC has matched my kick and I cant quite catch her. This is the second time she returned the favor for Bunny Hop. I see the clock and I’m surprised to see it already at 19:10 or so – I had thought faster. I crash through the finish in typical ugly race face fashion in 19:29. 6th overall, 4th male, 1st in age group. I technically won masters too, though it was a hollow victory with a 49 year old (Bob Daley) taking 3rd overall and bumping me up. I got a nice plate though, so a trophy hunt success! I’m pretty happy with the time – Garmin had 3.15 (certified course) and there’s always the Columbia famously hot heat index slowing you down in June.

Taking the win was 15 year old Bennett Egan. I don’t know him, but I would guess he’s a high school cross country guy.  Second was Rick Southard, another guy I’ve never seen before. Bob Daley (3rd)  is supposedly the guy who raced with the Pale Beast at the Richland R.U.N.S. 5k  but I havent seen him since. I guess he’s gotten faster with the 18:55.

The women’s race was super competitive for a first year event, with Kenzie taking the win, MC second and Heather Brumbach 3rd. Heather had to lean at the tape to edge out Dutch Fork’s Anna Jenkins. Anna, age 13, is going to be an absolute beast when she gets older. She already blue shoed me last year at Run Red Bank. In masters, I got the consolation prize win with Jeff Godby and Matt Bernthal taking 2nd and 3rd in another photo finish in 19:55. In fact, Anna, Heather, Jeff and Matt all crossed the line almost simultaneously in 19:54-19:55.  In women’s masters, Linn Hall took the win followed by Colleen “Don’t call me Mrs. Beast” Vowles and Lisa King.

Age group honor roll: Adam Bernthal crushed a 19:38 and beat his old man en route to a win in the 11-14. Anna Jenkins took the win on the girls side for a double sub 20 11-14 age group. Wow.  Angel and the Yerg went 1-2 in the 35-39. Marian Nanney crushed a 20:31 to take the women’s 35-39 with Jessica Workman 3rd. Michael Jensen won the 40-44. Wayne Shuler ran a very strong 21:25 to take first in the 45-49. Jonathan King edged out William Brown in the 50-54, with Tom Beattie 3rd. Larry Bates crshed a 21:19 to take the 55-59, with Tour director John Gasque 2nd.  It was a CRC sweep in the 60-64, with MIke Compton, Pete Poore and Leeds Barroll. Leeds demonstrated his brutal sprint kick that is very Blue shoesesque. I was so proud. Alex Ponomarev and Ken Lowden went 1-2 in a very competitive 65-69. Likewise with the 70+, won by Arnold Floyd, Peter Mugglestone and Henry Holt.

https://connect.garmin.com/activity/795739049

http://www.strictlyrunning.com/RESULTS/15SWEAT.TXT

 

 

 

Run Red Bank 5k and 10k – Lexington, SC – 5/30/15

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Run Red Bank is in its 5th year and this marks my 3rd time doing the race. I think the race was put on by a dental practice its first year (weird), but then was picked up by the YMCA and Erin Roof, which is how I started running it. As it has been thoroughly documented in this blog, Erin’s races are exceedingly swagtastic, so despite the long odds they are always worth a trophy hunt.

That being said, let”s not sugarcoat this. This race is tough. It was held at White Knoll high school and that course was brutal. The race had a change of venue to the Lexington YMCA in 2014, which I naturally assumed was done to make the course flatter. Um…not so much. I went charging out in the 5k last year like a maniac and died a thousand deaths climbing up a mountain for the first mile and a quarter. It didn’t help it was 80 degrees and humid either. The second half was mostly downhill but I was already toast. I got chicked by a 12 year old in the last half mile and ran my slowest 5k in 5 years (20:40 something).

So I wasn’t stoked to go back again initially, but Erin told me the 10k registration was pretty low, and apparently my lust for trophies outweighs any rational thought. Because what’s better than a humid, hilly sufferfest?… doing it twice, of course. I really need to stay away from Strictly Running’s website after a couple of beers.

Oh yeah, and I was coming back from injury too. After a tweaked back nixed by Get in the Pink race, my Hawaii toe acted up and made my shin feel all tight and sore. I was panicking about shin splints and stress fractures, but some rest and avoiding the hard runs seemed to have helped. I even skipped Jailbreak too, which about killed me. I mean, the header on this page is from that race. I wanted to cry.

Since this would be the first race in a few weeks, I figured I needed to take this one easy. Actually, let me clarify. I mean not maniacally, insanely hard. Once I get a bib on, you can forget easy. But at least maybe I could rein it in some. Yeah, impulse control is not my strong suit.

Lexington is a bit of a drive for me, but I managed to make it out there about 45 minutes early. Pretty sizable crowd was there already, helped by a huge group from Run for God. About as humid as last year, maybe a touch cooler. Orinthal Striggles, Shawanna and Ryan Plexico are like the first people I see, and my immediate thought is Mrs. Roof has tricked me with the false lure of a trophy hunt. Roy Shelley, James Hicks, JOhn Gasque, Pete Poore, Craig Wlaschin, Eric McMichael, Lucia and Jeff Smith, Cheryl and Tommy Outlaw, Tom Beattie, Andy Mikula and Barb Brandenburg are some of the other familiar faces. Most surprising is the absence of Barb’s evil husband, so despite all the fast peeps, the masters trophy hunt is looking better than most. It’s tough to tell who is running what race, but a quick analysis at the start says that I can take the 10k masters if I can hold off Joe Roof. Oh, and not die on the mountains. There’s always that.

runredbankcourse

With the start I keep telling myself to run this like a tempo. No one’s going to set any  PR’s on this course, and I need to protect the gimp shin. I figure if I can do 7 minute pace I should be OK.  No problems reining it in -the first mile is a killer. After a very brief plunge down, the next mile and a quarter is mostly an uphill slog all the way to Two Notch. The humidity is like a wet blanket. Luckily the legs are fairly fresh from reducing my miles most of May. Unfortunately it’s my brain that is hurting – it seems to have having trouble comprehending why in the bloody hell did I decide to do the 10k??. Especially when you climb 2 brutal hills then look out on a half mile mountain to climb after that. Apparently Shawanna and Angel are also taking it easy because they aren’t that far in front at the mile mark, which I hit in about 7:10. Another quarter mile and I’m finally at the summit for the first climb. I’m pretty gassed already. Two  young teenage kids, who are doing the 5k, keep trying to pass me. They would surge ahead, get tired, then apparently face unbearable shame by having a ghostly white Clydesdalish 40 year old  pass them again. Eventually the Albino Sasquatch broke their spirit. The next mile or so is pretty glorious. One long gradual downhill that lets you get rid of the lactic acid bath that your legs take at the start. I think I kind of zoned out at this point and just let gravity be my friend. Mile 2 came back in 6:50ish. At the bottom of the hill you hit a dirt stretch and I hit a low point mentally when I see the 4 mile marker. Low, because the heat and humidity is getting nasty really fast, I’m facing having to climb that damn mountain again, and I still wont even be near done when I get back down again and pass this 4 mile mark for real. Once the 10k  course splits off for my second lap I realize Erin wasnt lying about the registration being weak for the longer race. Suddenly everybody’s gone, and I realize I’m probably like 5th or 6th overall in the race despite taking it relatively easy.  I can still see Angel, Shawanna and Craig pretty far ahead, and I know OJ must be in another zip code by now. Loop 2 of the mountain is similar to the Double Quarry Crusher – it actually is about the same or slightly easier the second time around since your legs are warmed up. Mile 3 is 7:07. It’s nice to get near the top since I start hitting the back of the 5k pack and there’s people to see again. My biggest demotivator is not having people to try and catch. Conversely, I will fight to the death to keep someone from passing me. And it’s at the bottom of lap 2 that I start hearing quick footsteps behind me. At first I think it’s a 5ker suddenly kicking it in but then I realize its some super fit young guy doing the 10k trying to assert his dominance. He uses me as a windscreen for a while (smart choice)  then pulls ahead as we hit the dirt stretch. Oh hells no. I decide to stay just behind as we near the split point again. Suddenly he goes right at the split up the mountain again. Apparently he loved the hill so much he wanted to do it a third time. I hear some of the volunteers yell and I tell the rest to go get him. No one deserves to climb that thing 3 times. I break off to the left and head out into a short out and back in a neighborhood, which is yet another hill. Good times. This out and back is shared by the end of the 5k course and there’s plenty of traffic, but its pretty short. At the turnaround I see superfit is pretty close behind but maybe fading a bit. I decide to put some pep in my step on the downhill as the 10k course takes one more out and back that I’ve never seen before. I remember it looking not too bad on the course map but sure enough it starts with, you guessed it, another hill. The course takes a right turn and goes up a little more, and I keep telling myself the turnaround has got to be coming up pretty close. Then suddenly OJ appears. Oh dear God. I thought OJ had already completed the loop, and he’s easily 6-7 minutes faster than me when I’m going all out in a 10k. And here he his still coming back from this “short” out and back. Sure enough another expanse opens up and there is neither a turnaround or anyone else to be seen.  My brain reminds me how stupid I was for doing the 10k. Plus, any clouds or coolness from the morning is now burned off and it is getting hot in a hurry. After what seems like an eternity,  a teenager (Brady Rafanan), Shawanna and Angel  finally show up on their way back, and I can finally see the turnaround.

Heading back towards home I see mr. wrong way is still pretty close behind so I ramp up the pace a little bit – 1) to put some distance on him and 2) to get this thing done quicker. Andy Mikula is next in line behind, and then Joe Roof a couple of minutes back. I just need to make it home in one piece to sew up the masters win. More hills on the way back.  Fun. The heat and the course have taken their toll and a few cases of the walksies have broken out around me. I don’t blame them. Finally I crest a hill near the end of the 10k out-and-back and I realize it’s all downhill until right before the finish. I ramp it up pretty close to 5k pace to make sure the dude behind me doesn’t get any bright ideas. The 40 minute 5k crowd is fully traumatized by hearing a rabid bear approaching behind them, so I make sure I give them plenty of room when I pass. I finally make out the finish clock turning over to 44, and I sprint out the last little bit to cross in 44:16, 6th overall and 1st master!  I’ll take it since the goal was to do 7 minute pace – 7:08 by official results, though 6:58 / 6.35 miles by Garmin. Erin and the YMCA did not disappoint with a ceramic tile, 10 dollar Dick’s gift certificate and 50 bucks cash! Awesome.

Orinthal Striggles easily won the 10k overall with a 36:44. Aiken’s Brady Rafanan (40:33) placed 2nd and Harbison Trail Runner Craig Wlaschin  (41:27) took third. Among the ladies, Shawanna White went out for a jog (41:20) and still claimed the win, followed by Gina Campbell (49:29)  and Erin Thompson (52:36) .  Monica Wright won female masters.

In the age groups,  it turns out Luke Fang was the guy chasing me – he took 1st in the 25-29 ahead of Palmetto Runners’ Andy Mikula. Thomas Outlaw, the younger, claimed 2nd in the 30-34.  Angel won the 35-39 with James Hicks 3rd. Lucia Smith took 2nd in the 35-39 women. Roy Shelley easily claimed the 45-49. Joe Roof won the 50-54 , with pastor and TDBS reader James Laurence second. Tommy Outlaw, the slightly more mature, won the 55-59. Cheryl Outlaw completed the Outlaw sweep by placing 2nd in the women’s 55-59. Racing machine Brigitte Smith won the 65-69.

In the 5k, it was a good day for  Strictly Running with Ryan Plexico and Jordan Lybrand going 1-2 in the overall men and Erin Suttman and Barbara Brandenburg finishing 1st and 3rd among the women. Parker Roof finished 3rd male and Whitney Craft 2nd female. Masters winners included Lisa King and Palmetto Runners’ Eric McMichael.

Age groupers included: Team Utopia South’s Michael Jensen and Todd Whalen going 1-2 in the 40-44. Stephanie Dukes won on the women’s side with Lucia’s sister Aura Sinescu placing 2nd. Tom Beattie placed 2nd in the 50-54. Tour director John Gasque crushed the 55-59 by 5 minutes to take the win. Alsena Edwards and Sue Porter went 1-2 in the women’s 55-59. Pete Poore and Leeds Barroll took 2nd and 3rd in the 60-64, while ALex Ponomarev claimed the 65-69.  Peter Mugglestone, Henry Holt and Rocky Soderberg once again swept the 70+.

http://www.strictlyrunning.com/RESULTS/15REDBANK.TXT

https://connect.garmin.com/activity/794487448