Sweat it Out 5k – Columbia, SC – 6/1/24

I still consider it a newer race, but the Sweat it Out 5k has somehow been around since 2015 and is now in its 9th year. It has been a regular on the Blue Shoes and Tour de Columbia calendar, initially directed by fellow Sunday run slog jogger Shannon Godby and then taken over by Erin and GRIT endurance a few years later. True to form for an Erin Roof race, this event has featured some of the best swag, including the iconic Ernest Lee painting awards, which currently decorate my office and act as my Zoom/Teams background. I know my coworkers are impressed. The race proceeds go to benefit the National Foundation of Ectodermal Dysplasia, a group of disorders that includes hypohydrosis, or the inability to sweat. Nick, the son of race director Jamie Duke, has the condition, and it’s been cool to see the toddler at the first race now grow to a preteen.

Tragically, the year of the wonky Achilles wrecked my Sweat it Out streak in 2023, but given that I’m back at least at 85-90 percent, I wasn’t going to miss this year. At our first meeting of the year, the CRC board decided to bump up this event to cherished double points status, so it was sure to be a stud fest. I usually don’t look to have a fast time at this race with the heat, so I did a quick check of the forecast on Monday to see how miserable it would be. But wait… hold the phone, what is this?? 55 degrees? That’s incredible for June in this famously hot town.

Sure enough, I show up at 6 am for the 7 am start and it is actually COLD. People had jackets on and everything. 54 degrees by my car thermometer. At packet pickup, fellow GRIT spokesmodel Sarah suggested this year’s event be called “Shiver it Out”. She wasn’t wrong. The early start always throws a wrench into my pre-race colonic song and dance. It’s often a three act play but you can never rule out an encore performance. We would see. I did a couple miles with H, McElderry and Yerg to warm up, and by the time I get back there are beasts everywhere. Somehow, I managed 2nd overall in 2019 with a 20:20 something time. I might not be in the top 20 with that time this year. Jarvis and David Williams were sure to podium on the men’s side, but there were also masters studs OJ and Dimery. Joy Miller and Ivanka were picks to win among the women, but JLy, Ashley, Shannon, Sellers and Lindsey were also there to throw down some good times. Also, there were a whole slew of singlet wearing fast looking old dudes that were giving me the jitters. Damn you rando superfit dads.

Ten minutes before the start, I realize someone has indeed been cheering for the colon to come back on stage. DAMMIT. The line was a little long at the portapotties but it was moving. Thankfully Erin gave us an extra 5 minutes to poop. The start line is just ridiculous. I love to be grandiose and toe the line at most local 5ks but my fat ass was going to get run over if I did that for this race. I backed up probably 5 rows just to be sure. Reportedly there were 50ish CRC members on hand, and I don’t debate that number based on who I could see. Based on my start line selfie, I can see Mike Shrum, Eric and Sarah Allers, Jonathan McFall, Dimery, David Williams, Silent H, Brett Martin, Sellers, Rob THE YERG Yerger, Lindsey, Kirkwood , Patrick McElderry, Clay Ham, Sophie Homeyer, Dr. Ghering, Patrick Hall and Levi Beck.

The start was as predicted, a total blast out of the gates with all the fast people. I got passed by a ton of people given my usual negative split plan. There’s nothing I hate more than going too hard early and dying a thousand deaths in the last mile. But with the cool weather and feeling like I’m getting left in the dust, I probably amped it up more than usual. This course is virtually flat, with the only real hill coming an agonizing 2.5 miles in. I focused on keeping a steady pace and hanging on to Jly and Sellers, both known for going out blazing fast. Jordan makes sure Jen knows I’m right there and mocks the decidedly minimal amount of blue in my shoes. “WHITE SHOES!” I hit mile in 6:10 and there are still a ton of people ahead of me. Damn this is a competitive race this year. We are almost done with the second out and back loop before I finally catch Jly. The YERG is crushing it up ahead, so I try and stay in striking distance. I can tell that maybe, just maybe, the blue shoe mojo is coming back because I don’t feel abjectly awful at this point. It also probably helps that it feels like October. The third loop is the last and it’s a direct out and back trip on Saye Cut Rd. I was glad just to make it to Saye Cut before Hunter left it, but it isn’t long before he and a whole host of SC’s finest road racers come into view headed back.

Saye cut ends at a cone and I turn around like a runaway bus, also trying not to tweak anything in the process. Right on my tail I see Bobby Bartley , Ashley Holman and JLy. I’m starting to hurt a bit now, but I have YERG in my sights. I think I’ve got him but damned if he isn’t slowing down. We turn back on the Galway to head straight back to the start, and I can see the infamous hill looming ahead. Garmin chirps back at 6:13 so staying pretty even. I almost draw even with Rob at the hill, but he is even better at hill climbing than I am, having done a ton of mountain ultras. In front of Meadowfield, I know there is less than a half mile to go. I have Yerg just ahead, but there’s also a red singlet wearing guy (later ID’d as Bruno Alcalde) with some gray in his hair just ahead of him. Damn masters is brutal in this town. Yerg starts to ramp it up and he draws even with Bruno and then slowly edges ahead. I feel like death, but if there’s a finish line to be seen I know I can always find another gear. The trick is knowing not to push in all the chips too early. As we clear Meadowfield, I can see the finishing arch in the distance. HERE WE GO. Time for the Blue, or perhaps white, shoe kick. Full throttleup commences and I weave through Bruno and Yerg and out into the open. And oh man, it hurts. Full karate chop hands, giant head bobbing all over the place, and form going all to hell. Mile 3 alert pops up but I am in full tunnel vision by this point. For some reason I feel compelled to lunge at the line like it’s an Olympic sprint and I have to full on HYC style collapse in the finish area. That is the sacrifice to make all of 16th place. 19:19 by chip and consolation 2nd in age group since OJ got on the masters podium. While my chicken man award may be smaller this year, I’m pretty psyched for my fastest time since spring of last year. Plus, I got a GRIT gift at the award ceremony. I wasn’t sure who she was describing until she mentioned “giant ego” and then I knew it was me. Yep, just like the Carly Simon song.

In the overall, Hunter Jarvis correctly navigated the course this week en route to a win in 16:14. From the way he looked on Saye Cut, it was like a jog in the park for him. David Williams was second in 16:35 and new Columbian Shawn Wiler was 3rd in 16:39.

Joy Miller took home a big win in the women’s race, clocking 17:57 before hopping in the car to Sumter to double dip another win an hour or so later. Ivanka Tolan kicked my tail en route to second place in 19:08, with Ashley Holman claiming third in 19:52.

Masters on both sides was nuts: Dimery, Orinthal Striggles and Aaron Schaffner claimed the male podium, with Jason and OJ going sub 17. On the women’s side, Shannon Godby was the champion with Marian Nanney 2nd and Sarah Allers 3rd. Sarah, OJ and Ivanka were the top age graded athletes, all hovering right at 85 percent. Incredible. Shannon, Joy, Dimery and Robert McBee also crossed the 80 percent age grade, representing national class level competition. Not too shabby for a local 5k!

Age group honor roll (female): Lilly Holman was 2nd in the 11-14. Hannah Williams won the 15-19. Sellers was 3rd in an insanely competitive 25-29. Lindsey Hendren won the 30-34. Jennifer Lybrand, Kara Stevens and Sara McFall took top 3 in the 35-39. Shenequa Coles, Stephanie Dukes and Angie Thames swept the 50-54. Lynda Leonardi won the 55-59. Colleen Towery was champ of the 60-64. Diane Freeman and Margie Shelburg won the 65-69.

Age group honor roll (male): Graham McLaughlin was 2nd in the 20-24. Josh Odell was tops in the 25-29 with Regan Freeman 2nd. Levi Beck won the 30-34. Mike Shrum, Johnathan McFall and Wesley Sawyer claimed the podium in the 35-39. Bruno Alcalde, Bobby Bartley and Brett Martin (new PR!) took top 3 in the 40-44. Brad Batchelder won the 45-49 over the epic Blue Shoes/YERG battle. Patrick McElderry, Johnathan Kirkwood and Eric Allers swept the 50-54. Robert McBee, Roy Shelley and Silent H won the 55-59, while Clay Ham, Eliere Tolan and Phil Smith did the same in the 60-64. Pete O’Boyle won the 65-69 while Jerry Rich and Leeds Barroll went 1-3 in the 70-74. Richard Wright and Ken Lowden claimed the 75+.

Other notable finishers: Kerry Stubbs, Maria Pray, Clara Beaudet, Harry Strick, Pete Poore, Hou Yin Chang, Nicole Charlton, Gretchen Lambert, Traci Smith, Deanna Rennick, Melinda Waldrop, Wendy Homeyer, Teresa Shelton, Missy Caughman, Sophia Homeyer, Tug Quarles, Leighton McLendon, Son Nguyen, John Richards, Michael Beaudet, Michaela Willoughby, Drew Dickerson, Patrick Hall and Julia Ghering.

Crawdaddy Dash 5k – Columbia, SC – 5/4/24

May16

It’s been several years since the Rosewood Crawdaddy Dash happened, and I was sure it was no more, but I was super happy to see Erin and GRIT revive it. I was at the inaugural race, which was probably 2011-ish. The Crawfish festival which hosts the race used to bring in 1990s alt rock vets like Everclear and Better then Ezra, so definitely right up my alley. Later, Hunter Gatherer built their Hangar outpost, and no one has to twist my arm for a post-race beer. 2014 report below:

Rosewood Crawdaddy Dash 5k – Columbia, SC – 5/3/2014

The course has a bit of a tough climb to start, but few races end with virtually 2 miles of downhill and flatness. I thought I was excited about the race, but few can match the enthusiasm of Regan Freeman. I did a half mile warm up with him and dude was AMPED. I was jealous of his crawdaddy hat though. I can always get behind a good costume. In fact, Crawdaddy was being held on the same day as the May the Fourth race, enabling me to do a rare cosplay double, Obi-Wan and Crawdaddy boxer guy. Luckily the two races were 90 minutes apart, so an easy ride over. I didn’t quite have to drive like a maniac, but somehow, I weaved through USC graduation traffic from Saluda Shoals and made it to Hunter Gatherer by about 9 am. There might have been an entitled violation of a police barrier since I drove up from the back. I’ll never tell.

It felt better to not have long pants and a robe on, but it was still pretty miserable outside. Legs got super tight on the ride over too, so that was also fun. There was a nice crowd on hand and tons of CRCers, plus quite a few double dippers. Not sure of all of them, but Chris, Melody, Nicki, Brett, Stevie, HYC , Ivery and Roy made the trip from Saluda Shoals. Thankfully there were plenty of portapotties, because I’m always afraid of another infamous “true to the poo” incident from one of my other double dips. Again, zero time goal here, just get to the finish line.

At the start, I try to position myself for maximum pic exposure on the front line, but I get passed almost immediately by about 20 people. Fantastic. As advertised, the first mile is a complete struggle bus on this course, though the initial 800 meters is the toughest. I try and maintain a decent pace, but my Jedi jaunt has apparently destroyed my life force. It feels like everybody and their mom is ahead of me and I just have nothing. I pace pretty evenly with Kara Stevens and clock in a tick under 7 minutes as we turn onto Rosewood. For reference I like 6:15 out of the gates, but that’s all I have today. What’s nice is knowing there are no more hills. I turn onto Ott and we all start the long gradual slog down to Owens field. The Ott St decline has been a favorite of mine for all virtual races, including the 2020 palmetto 200 and the 2021 virtual sweat it out with Yerg when he couldn’t make it in person. It’s really long and you can stride out the whole way down. Mile 2 in 6:39 so I’m at least near my 10k pace by now. Sellers Williamson, Brendan Holman and Seth Lapic are in sight but I’m kind of on my own at this point. Ashley is off Montgomery st taking pics, so I make sure to do some posing with what little oxygen I have left. I try and push it in mile 3 to at least get under 21. I manage to catch Sellers and I see Brendan, Seth and Yerg as I take a right on Jim Hamilton Blvd. I am very relieved to feel no wind on this stretch, because it can be brutal when it’s in your face. Luckily the only thing holding me back is 195 lbs of poor conditioning. But, hell, might as well blast out whatever you have. I start tracking down Brendan and suddenly he catches a case of the walksies. I scream at him and he sees the truly frightening sight of a pale ass tan lined sasquatch barreling his way. He takes off again in a startle but the walksie bug hits again a little while later and I manage to pass him about 200 meters from the finish. Seth is up ahead. He may be weakened by a blazing 3:03 London Marathon two weeks ago, but still better than me today. I am just toast by the finish, beautifully captured by my finish line photo, which looks like a cross between a stroke or a bad taco bell experience. Just hideous, as always. Finish time of 20:44. 9th overall. To clarify how brutal the masters competition is in Columbia, this was only good for 5th masters and technically 4th in my 45-49 age group. Luckily, the top three 45-49 people got taken up by masters overall and I got a “consolation” 1st in AG on the podium. But hey, I’ll take even a fake number one.

Overall winners in this race included the ageless Orinthal Striggles, churning out a 17:03 at age 48. Steven Hicks finally broke through in a big way with a very sub 18 in 17:41 for second across the line. He opted to take first masters, so official 2nd was Cole Andrew in 17:49 with 3rd going to Regan in a nice 18:56. Ivanka Tolan took the overall women’s race in 19:59 , with Sellers 2nd in 21:28and Kara 3rd in 21:46 for a CRC sweep. Male masters included Chris Branham in 2nd, with a nice 19:09 in the second leg of a double dip, and Rob THE YERG Yerger in 3rd. Female masters winners were Marian Nanney in 1st with Melody Kreiling taking an impressive 2ns at age 64.

Female Age group honors: Michaela Willoughby was 2nd in the 25-29. Shelley Rivers was champ of the 40-44. Kristin Wllace and Deanna Rennick won 1st and 3rd in the 45-49. Stevie Dee Dukes, Missy Caughman and Melinda Waldrop swept the 50-54. Kelly Danias was 2nd in the 55-59. Teresa Harrington won the 60-64. Margie Shelburg was 2nd in the 65-69.

Male age group honors: Christopher Houck won 1st in the 30-34 with Ian Loughlin 2nd. Seth Lapic and Antjuan Seawright took the top 2 in the 35-39. Brendan Holman and Brett Martin went 1-2 in the 40-44. With all the studs in the overall and masters, I won the 45-49 by a mere 10 minutes. That has to be a record. Ivery Baldwin, Drew Dickerson and Todd Derrick won the 50-54. Roy Shelley, Eliere Tolan and Leighton McClendon swept the 55-59. Clay Ham was 1st and Phil Smith 3rd in the 60-64. Leeds Barroll won the 70-74, while Richard Wright and Ron Hagell took the 75+.

Other notable finishers: Son Nguyen, Nicole Charlton, Maria Pray, Traci Smith, Kathryn Houck, Kristin Loughlin, and Gretchen Lambert.

Lucky Leprechaun 5k – Camden, SC – 3/2/24

Mar10

The Lucky Leprechaun 5k was established in 2018 to help promote the Irish Fest in Camden. While I am always somewhat reluctant to leave the confines of the Columbia metropolitan area, this race promised free green beer at the finish line, a pancake-flat course and the ever-present swag /awards of a GRIT event. Add to this it was being held ON MY BIRTHDAY, and I was in. Camden is barely a half hour from the casa del Blue Shoes, so really not much of a trip anyway. Erin then made the group (of mostly Camden and Elgin runners) sing Happy Birthday to me at the award ceremony, andpresented me with a giant birthday cookie cake. I’m sure 90 percent of the 2018 registrants wondered a) who the hell is this guy? and b) why is he such an insufferable egomaniac? Legitimate questions, both. What I didn’t know is that the ego stroking was only a ploy in Erin’s long game to find someone ridiculous enough and attention-whorish enough to serve as the race mascot, Lucky Leprechaun himself. So, forever indebted to the 2018 birthday celebration, I was that person. Except for an ill-timed college friend’s wedding in 2022, I’ve been the leprechaun ever since.

And let me tell you, the suit is hideous. Decked out in green velour, gold/green vest and striped socks, this thing is not attractive. It also has to be dry cleaned, which may or may not have occurred in 6 years, as well as stuffed in a closet 364 days a year. It’s pretty gross. But it definitely will get your attention, especially when you’re already 6’3” and probably 7 feet with the insane looking jaunty stovepipe hat.

However, it is not completely race unfriendly. The green velour pants are definitely light and airy, so much so that the 2019 photos are probably not suitable for viewing by children. My best time is a 19:03 in 2021, but after a year of a gimpy Achilles, I couldn’t touch that in regular racewear in 2024. My time last year was 20:03 at the beginning of my injury woes, so that was a more realistic goal.

I tried to arrive early for the race, but sometimes the race day colon is a fickle mistress, so I was a little late. The place was packed, so there was definitely an uptick in registrations, even with the competition at the Spurs Up Sprint in Columbia and the Myrtle Beach Marathon. I haven’t raced since Dam to Dam a few weeks ago and everything was tight. This would be interesting. My warmup included a rogue visit to an unofficial portapotty and getting verbally lambasted by a teen volunteer for running off course. I was like, dude do you think the race started 30 minutes early and I’m leading the entire field by a half mile in this outfit? But hey, I admire the dedication to duty. Weatherwas nice but a little humid.

At the start, there was a huge CRC contingent, officially 31 of us by the group list on runsignup. Sarah and Eric Allers even came in from Rock Hill. Competition looked pretty stiff, with a couple of young dudes and Chris Branham signing up last second to scrounge points. Do we have a threat to Jarvis’ supremacy on the overall Tour? Shannon Godby was back to defend her 2023 title on the women’s side.

My goal in this race was to not get hurt, start easy-ish and negative split. With the gun, I’m still tight and race pace feels brutal. Everyone is passing me and there’s a small part of me that tells me I could just mail this one in, especially with the suiton. But every time that thought gets overridden by the insanely, maniacally competitive primitive race brain that supersedes all logic. The course is a pretty much a rectangle. While fairly flat, the first half is a gradual uphill and the second half the same grade downhill. If you make it to the turnaround in decent shape, you can crush the last mile plus.

After being reassured my Achilles wouldn’t snap, I focused on trying to catch up with everyone that blew me away at the start. Sarah was leading a pack of young girls, which was cool to see her still inspiring the younger generation. She also made sure to trash talk me as I pulled alongside and told me to smack her husband in the rear if I could catch him. I’m pretty sure Eric would administer a leprechaun assault and battery if I tried that. Mile 1 was like 6:40ish, so I definitely needed to pick it up to have a chance at 20. I managed to pull up to Mr. Allers and Shannon a little over a mile in, and I was starting to feel the effect of the pace uptick and the heat of a couple layers of velour. Just ahead of them was this kid, and just as I started to pass him, he cut me off. Oh, he probably didn’t see me. A few dozen meters later, same thing. OH IT’S ON NOW, BUDDY. I pull a 2010 Marcus Lattimore maneuver and blow by this dude with the agility of, well, a 7 foot almost 49 year old leprechaun with a bad foot. Nothing like asserting your dominance against a pesky 8th grader.

I can see the pace car way ahead, and finally, finally it turns to the right. Every year it just seems longer. Rounding the turn is awesome, because suddenly your treadmill is on negative 1 percent instead of the opposite. Mile 2 is 6:30ish , so it’s going to take a miracle to get a sub 20. Plus, what felt like moderate humidity and 50ish degrees now feels like mid-August in the suit. I’m kind of dying but at least I now have my significant gravitational advantage on my side. I start to ramp it up a bit, but there isn’t much gas in the tank. Also, I’m surprised to see an a) an unknown female leading the women’s race and b) she is matching my kick step for step. I’m making zero progress. We finally crash back onto the main drag of Camden, Dekalb street,and I am toast. I can see the finish turn just ahead but mystery girl is thoroughly kicking my ass. I think I can maybe throw down a headless chicken pass at the end, but it’s just not happening. She whups my tail and finishes a few seconds before I blast through in 20:11. Good enough for 11th place (10th male) and a solitary TDC overall point. I’ll take it.

The race finish area featured pint glasses and big golden trophies for the overall and masters, as well as St Patty’s Day donuts from Mondo donuts. And did we mention beer? There was also beer. Maybe not my high gravity snooty IPAs, but a Mich Ultra will do at 8:30 in the morning. I can also say the donut was on point, since I ate it like a rabid raccoon in the car on the way home. Awesome race as always!

Overall: Sixteen-year-old Benjamin Rabon got the win in 18:15, with Chris Branham 2nd in 18:45 and Benjamin Laprise 3rd in18:49. In the women’s race, hats off to Molly Williams for holding off the Leprechaun for the win in 20:08. Shannon Godby crushed a 20:34 for 2nd and Sarah Allers was 3rd in 21:33. Shannon scored a 81 percent age grade while Sarah posted a near world class level 89 percent. Wow.

The timing company took masters runners out of the overall, so unofficially, the male masters podium was Jeff Brandenburg (19:01 and also an 81 percent age grade), the leprechaun, and Eric Allers. Female masters winners were Barbara Brandenburg, Jennifer McLeod and Kristin Wallace.

Age group honor roll (female): Hayden Hall was 3rd in the 11-14. Julia Ghering was the champ of the 25-29, with Michaela Willoughby 2nd. Toni Jumper was 2nd in the 40-44. Bertha Woehl was 2nd in the 55-59. Melody Kreiling and Colleen Towery were 1-2 in the 60-64. Mary Cassidy was 2nd in the 65-69.

Age group honor roll (male): Regan Freeman won the 25-27. Patrick Hall was 3rd in the 45-49. Eric Allers was 1st in the 50-54, while Frank Seier was tops in the 55-59. Tony Yarborough and Phil Smith were 1-3 in the 60-64. George Cassidy and Pete Poore went 1-2 in the 70-74. Ron Hagell was 2nd in the 75-79.

Other notable finishers: Michael Beaudet, Clara Beaudet, Drew Dickerson, Margie Shelburg, Stevie Dee Dukes, Son Nguyen, Teresa Shelton. Pam Griffin, Nikki Charlton, Cassidy Carter, Tammy Carter, Dianne Steadman, Maria Pray, Sherry Blizzard. Sorry if I missed anyone.

https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/53235#resultSetId-440185;perpage:100

Prosperity Fire Department 5k and True to the Brew 10k double dip – Prosperity/Pomaria/Peak, SC – 3/30/19

Mar31

Having died a thousand deaths in the last leg of the Palmetto 200 with the Van on the Run ultra team, I figured I’d take this week easy. I was signed up for the True to the Brew 10k, but at least it was flat, and hopefully I could throw down a decent time without exerting too much effort. Sadly, the Bunny Hop had moved their date to this weekend, so my tenure as the 7 foot rabbit had to take a hiatus. I was halfway into a week of half-hearted slog jogs and too much tennis when Roy Shelley, the newly “elected” ~~dictator~~ president, of the Columbia Running Club, messaged me. He had a double dip challenge for us, with a time window so small it would probably need 2 cars and possibly some executive favors. As it turned out, the Prosperity Fire Department 5k and 10k were starting their races early, with a 7:30 10k and 7:45 5k. True to the Brew started at 8:30. The races were about 15 minutes apart, give or take, so if you could finish the 5k in well under 25 minutes, hop in the car by 8:10ish, there was about a 5-6 minute cushion to make it to TTTB. As probably the most enthusiastic double dipper in the CRC, how could I refuse??

Probably by exercising good judgement, but I digress. Let me say this, Roy puts way more effort in planning things than I do. Dude sends me an agenda, the USATF race routes, road maps. I’m surprised he didn’t get us a police escort. Speaking of executive privilege, one of the hangups to our plan was the 1 mile shuttle from the parking area to the TTTB start, so we made a plea to Erin Roof for a special parking spot. It seems the Palmetto Conservation Society was being kind of strict, so there was some uncertainty about whether we could get near the start. I figured we would be so late that no one would stop us, but just in case, Pres. Shelley printed out an official “parking pass”. Apparently you can get away with anything if you act like you know what you’re doing.

IMG_9431 (2)_LI.jpg

We had originally planned to meet at the Pomaria ball fields (official TTTB parking) at 6:45 to drop my car off, but typical of my planning style, I called Roy at 6:25 to change it to Peak. TTTB is a point to point race and requires a shuttle to get back to the start, so I figured we might as well use our 2 cars for some good and enable us to leave TTTB at our leisure.

We got to the Prosperity race about 7:05, and actually had to register on site since our plan was hatched so late. We already had the TTTB bibs from early packet pickup, a critical rule of double dipping strategy. I had half-hoped for a trophy hunt at Prosperity. I figured 4 races on the Tour, and this one had both a 5k and a 10k , and it was way out from Columbia. It fit all the Blue Shoes trophy hunting criteria. One snafu though. Apparently there was prize money, so the first thing I see are two local Kenyan guys, Harrison Kirigwi and Norman Maihathi, who decided to split the races and easily take the cash. DOH! Kenzie Riddle was racing for the first time in 2 years in the 5k, and Joy Miller was running the ten. So we had our overall winners set from the start line. Coach B would be racing with me in the 5k for second place. The whole Pearson clan was on hand with Tim, Edy and Tori representing. Ivery Baldwin, Thomas Outlaw, Gretchen Lambert and Tom Lance were some other familiar faces.

At the 5k line, I think the RD saw me taking pics and delayed the start for a minute. Thanks to me, now things were really tight. I took off pretty hard from the gun but my legs were still hating me from the P200. Harrison leaves us all immediately, and at the first turn onto Main St, Kenzie and Mark pass me. This course is super flat, and I think I’m giving a decent effort, but I have zero spring in my step. The police car is guiding Harrison, so they send out a 4 wheeler to be the lead “car” for the mere mortals, which is nice. Mile 1 is like 6:37, a good 20+ seconds off my typical 5k pace. I try not to think about the 10k in my near future, but it definitely sinks in as we hit a long stretch on highway 76. I keep Kenzie and Mark within about 10-20 meters for most of the race. There’s a turn around near the 2 mile mark, and Roy is not too far behind, so hopefully we can jump in the car ASAP. I briefly flirt with pushing in all the chips to try and catch Coach B, but he’s summoning his own kick and I got nuthin. Kenzie is right ahead and I almost catch her with the small hill up to the finish but end up a second behind her. 20:27. Ugly time for sure, but good for 3rd male overall in this trophy hunt. I grab 2 waters from the cooler and Roy comes in a shade under 23 minutes. We both head to the car a sweaty mess and take off, right at 8:10 by my watch. There were a couple of ways we could have gotten to Pomaria, but we decide to go by the Google maps quickest version. Yeah, google maps didn’t adjust for morning 5ks with a bunch of walkers. We end up sitting on 76 staring at someone’s boat trailer for what seems like an eternity. Finally we turn off 76 towards Pomaria, but everyone and their mom is also going that way. As far as the rest of the trip, I would give you details, but per my attorney driver, we “proceeded cautiously, obeying all road signs and observing posted speed limits“. Let’s just say I didn’t need pre-race warmups to get my adrenaline going.

Roy tears into Pomaria, I mean eases into the town center, and as we randomly park. I can hear Erin actually counting down to the start. I jump out of the car, hurdle over some grass, narrowly avoid plowing into Joe Roof , and somehow my Garmin miraculously finds a satellite in my 50 meter dash, as I hit the front of the pack just as the countdown hits zero. MADE IT! YAY!

But there was a price to pay. Apparently Thanos has exacted his infinity stone power on my colon because suddenly I don’t feel so good.

Fifty meters in and I’m already scouting out the woods. Maybe it will pass. Maybe it was just the adrenaline of the start. Maybe if I pick up the pace it will go away. Negative, ghost rider. This was not going to be pretty. First there’s a stretch of woods with barbed wire, then a swamp. Oh dear God. Then it goes away for a bit…then comes back with a vengeance. Finally I come up with the bridge idea. I duck under a bridge at about 2 miles, have to climb down with gimp legs, watch for snakes, make 1000 percent sure there are no potential witnesses and sweet Jesus unspeakable horrors were then committed under that bridge. Thankfully there was also a stream there, also of questionable microbiologic content. I can hear everyone tramping on the bridge overhead, oblivious to the haz mat scene just under their feet. Finally, in what seems like ten minutes, but was actually about 4, I emerge like a enormous dazed troll from under the bridge. And since I have completely blown any TDC points from this race, an enormous, dazed and depressed troll. I feel lighter though definitely with that not so fresh feeling. But there are 4 miles to go and this is not an out and back loop, so I push on. I at least try to maintain around 8 minute pace, because I’m just ready to get this thing done. For those not hampered by a distempered colon, it was a beautiful day on a flat trail through the forest. Just about perfect. I managed to catch up with a bunch of people who were thoroughly confused by my presence. It’s hard to find new ways to politely say I HAD TO TAKE A GIANT DUMP. The last mile or two I started catching some of CRC age groupers, so I picked up the pace to give myself a hell snowball’s chance of age group glory. Of course, I spotted Drew and Nance and Yerg and McGrievy at the start, so these guys were going to have to place and then go three deep masters for me to have a chance. I also forgot that my Garmin was stopped during my off road excursion, so instead of possibly breaking 50 minutes I was closer to 54. Still, there were a couple of middle aged looking dudes in the last mile and I took off , ending in a sprint on the bridge at the finish. Yeah, I should have saved my energy. 53:46, 7th in age group.

The finish line was awesome for this race as usual. There was a good band that actually played at a reasonable volume (as opposed to the occasional race DJs who think they’re at South beach at 3 am), subs, and of course beer, served up by the Craft and Draft guys. Weather was perfect too -70’s and sunny. There was a huge Columbia running club/Harbison Trail Runners/RWB/RUI contingent on hand with Brie and Matt McGrievy, Tracy Tisdale, Bobby Scott, Sabrina Gandy, Ed Aufuldish, Pete O’Boyle, Winston Holliday, Naomi Rabon, Julie McKinnon, Ken and Sheila Bolin, Jen Clyburn, Mike and Pam Griffin, Mackenzie Wilt, Mario Alvarez, Matt Havens, Birte and Jeff Fretwell, Jim Williams, Jeff Longway, Lisa Powell, Ronda Sanders, Mike Ferguson, Renee and Patrick McCormick, Will Rowan, Joe and Janette Robinson, Betsy Long, Teresa Shelton, Lorand Batten, Michael Beaudet, Clara Nance, Lois and Bryan Leaburn, Teresa Harrington, Missy Caughman, Kara Clyburn, Bertha Woehl, Ron Hagell, Chesson Merritt, Maria Pray, Mike and Janice Compton, Sharon Sherbourne, Patti Lowden, Harry Strick, and Shirley Smith. Amazing turnout for a day with so may other races going on.

Prosperity

Overall 5k winners were Harrison Kirigwi in 15:55, Coach B was second with the Sasquatch 3rd. Kenzie won the women’s race, with Stacy Willard and Haley Thomason completing the podium.

5k age groupers were President Roy taking first in the 50-54. Tim Pearson took 3rd in the 55-59 with his new bionic knee.

In the 10k, Norman Maihathi took the win in 39 minutes, with Jon Lawson Cope 2nd and Ivery Baldwin getting third. Nice trophy hunt, Ivery!

10k age groupers: Tori Pearson won the 30-34. Thomas Outlaw (jr) won the 35-39. Gretchen Lambert took 3rd in the 45-49. Tom Lance won the 50-54. Edy Pearson won the 55-59, while Tommy Outlaw took the 60-64.

In the TTTB:

Mike Nance edged Drew Williams for the win in an epic showdown of Team Carebeers (our Ville to Ville relay team for April 13). Jeff Fretwell was 3rd.

Among the women, Birte Fretwell captured her second True to the Brew title after her half marathon win at Croft State Park last year. Sally Singleton and Jessica Weems were 2nd and 3rd.

Mens masters was won by TUS beast Ed Aufuldish, the YERG and Winston Holliday. Colleen Vowles, Jen Clyburn and Naomi Rabon swept female masters.

Female Age groups: Makenzie Wilt was 3rd in the 30-34. Julie “2017 Scrotum of the Year” McKinnon and Brie McGrievy went 1-2 in the 40-44. Tracy “Jedi Runner” Tisdale was 3rd in the 45-49. Lisa Powell was 2nd in the 55-59. Lois Leaburn won the 60-64. Sharon Sherbourne was second in the 65-69. Patti Lowden was tops in the 70+.

Male age groups: Beer mile director Bobby Scott won the 30-34. Matt McGrievy won the 40-44. Ken Bolin and Roy Shelley went 1-2 in the 50-54. Mario Alvarez and Jim Williams took the top 2 spots in the 55-59. Pete O’Boyle and Jeff Longway were 2nd and 3rd in the 60-64. Mike Compton was 65-69 champ, while Ron Hagell won the 70+.

Prosperity Fire Department 5k/10k: https://www.strictlyrunning.com/json/Index_JS_C4.asp?uRaceId=3067

True to the Brew: Pomaria to Peak 10k

https://runsignup.com/Race/Results/53330?fbclid=IwAR1Nj5aiBSVq0L83zNEpLfJmW_G1VH3au_XhM38J8AJxqf35fNbtqwrbYFw#resultSetId-148027;perpage:10

Alex’s true to the POO 10k: https://www.strava.com/activities/2252364070

Alex’s Prosperity 5k: https://www.strava.com/activities/2252362370

Race for the Place 5k – Shandon – Columbia, SC – 2/9/13

Feb13

The Race for the Place is a relatively new 5k (I think in its 4th year) that starts and finishes near St. Joseph’s Catholic Church in Shandon. It benefits St Lawrence Place (the “place” in the name), a shelter for homeless families.

For whatever reason, this race has become super competitive. I think they offer prize money for the top overall winners, but I’m not sure why all the other big dawgs come out for this one. Its on one of the many rectangle Shandon courses that’s pretty flat, so I think a lot of people do this race to try and PR. Last year was particularly nuts, especially for my age group. I ran a 19:19, one of my fastest times at that point, and ended up 15th overall and SEVENTH in age group. Code ran an 18:50 and didnt even place. Derek Gomez ran an 18:35 …and ended up third. And thats just because Becraft took an overall place.

They have cool painted ceramic tiles as age group awards in this race, so I really wanted to place this year, but if 2012 was any indication, I had about zero chance. I did actually cut way back in my miles in the week before the race in an attempt to win back some of the mojo lost at the Red Nose Run. That race sucked for me – just no energy or motivation.

I showed up ridiculously early as I always do. Already, there were plenty of elite types roaming around. Ashton was there to try and repeat his win here last year. OJ Striggles and Justin Bishop were there, though I later learned he was guiding Amy. I was hoping he and Eric might battle it out and push each other to some fast times. Amy and Kenzie showed up to what I thought would be a close battle for the overall female. Team Allers were there fresh off their domination of the 5k and mile at Tybee. The Diesels, Drew Williams, 621 ninjas Shufy Rowe, Mike Hedgecock , Erin Miller and Pete O’Boyle; Hal Ray, Shannon Iriel, Whitney Keen, Eric McMichael, Kristin Schmitz, the Griffins, Gasque, Lisa Smarr, Del Soule, Henry Holt, Mickie Ishizue, Pete Poore, Valerie Selby, Rocky, Patti Lowden, and the Robertsons were some of the familiar faces.

Oh, and don’ t forget Trophy. Trophy reached his peak in 2011 when he broke 20 minutes for the first time…and then he never did it again. Having fallen into Blackjack 5ks in the past few months, the plan for 2013 was to bring back the Mcgaha Magic. I’ve been dragging him through hellish Blue Shoes style workouts like Mt Sesqui/sand hell repeats and hilly 16 milers at 7:30ish pace. Good fun. I give him credit, though. He has definitely put in some work. His goal was to go low 20 in this race, and maybe..just maybe ..reach the beautiful land of the 19’s.

In the past few months I had found an even more wonderful world, that of the 18’s, and I really wanted to get back there. This course was flat and my legs were fresh, so I figured I had a chance. Still, I’ve been fighting off the plague all week, so I was less than 100 percent.

With the start, I tried to hold back some. This worked for about 5 seconds, and I latched on the back of a pack with Drew, Amy, Hedge and Kenzie. In other words, I was already trying to be a hero. Half mile in and it seemed a bit brisk. I could still see the lead car and Ashton hauling ass down Heyward St on the first turn, so I knew this was probably a little too speedy, but sometimes my figurative head is as big as my actual enormous melon. Oh, and apparently the contour of the earth changed from last year, because I’ll be damned if there arent actual hills on this course. No monsters, but enough to subtly beat you down. First mile : 5:54. Apparently my 4 year old and I share the same level of self restraint.

I’m sucking wind already, so I try to step off the throttle just a bit. When I do that, though, I fall off the back of the pack just in front. Kenzie has also fallen off the back so I try and keep up with her. Theyre letting cars behind us already, so at least I feel confident no one is going to come up and Blue Shoe me. Finally we hit the turnaround of the rectangle, and this always gives me a little psychological boost. I round the turn at Hand middle school and actually pass Kenzie. This briefly makes me think I must be throwing down some killer pace, but then the mile comes back only at 6:15. Damn. I know 19 minutes is 6:07 pace, but I cant do the math when my brain is fighting for oxygen to survive. I know I’m almost right on it. I try and kick it in basically the whole last mile. And it hurts..bad. I have got to find a way to run more relaxed, because the main pain seems to be in my arms, probably from holding them like an uptight T-rex for the past 15 minutes. I can see Hedge reeling back in a bit, but he’s holding his pace pretty well. I’m half delirious by the time we hit the home stretch, but they hide the finish behind one last little corner, so I can’t see the clock. Finally I hit that turn and its like 18:48. I blast forth in full ugly race face mode, letting behind all dignity in a desperate lunge for sub 19. I cross the line and collapse in a heap. And Jess tells me I made it, 18:59.3 or something is what I thought I heard.

I’m just wobbling to stand when all of a sudden here comes trophy blasting around the corner with the clock in the 19:50’s. He’s killing it and sure enough…19:57. The sub 20 Trophy is back! Pretty awesome. He was hoping to get there by April but apparently he’s been on a mission. I’m just a little afraid I might be part of that mission.

I ‘m all euphoric until I check the results..19:00???. WTF! Crushed by a fraction of a second. Still, I get 2nd in AG because all of last years 35-39 studs stayed home, except for Drew who took 1st. Since OJ took an overall spot, Trophy not only gets a sub 20 but an age group award too by winning 3rd.

Eric Ashton crushed the field by a minute in a half to take the win. 16 minutes for him is like a stroll. OJ took second in 17:30 and Josh Horn third Amy won the female overall, with Kenzie finishing 2nd on a less than great day for her. Mary Claire Cox finished third to chick Trophy by 2 seconds.

Age groupers included Andy Mikula (1st 25-29), Kristin Schmitz and Jennifer Ward in the 30-34, Erin Miller 1st in the 35-39, Eric Allers and Hedge in the 40-44, Hal Ray , Mike Grffin and Tigs in the 50-54, Pete O’Boyle , Shufy Rowe and Valerie Selby in the 55-59, Alex Ponamarev in the 60-64, Patti Lowden and Sharon Sherbourne in the 60-64, Del Soule and Margaret Holt in the 65-59, and Henry Holt and Rocky Soderberg in the 70+.

http://www.strictlyrunning.com/RESULTS/13RACE4PLACE.TXT

http://connect.garmin.com/activity/271369399