The Run with All Your Heart 5k is a race created by the Future Leaders of Medicine group at USC School of Medicine and goes to fund a charity which fights pediatric cancer (Curing Kids Cancer). It was originally run around Segra Park, but they recruited Erin Roof and GRIT endurance and moved the venue to the School of Medicine campus. As a former med student myself, it’s always fun to come back to the old stomping grounds. I honestly have no idea how these kids manage the informational firehose of med school and find time to manage a road race in their spare time. But maybe I was just lazy.
But I’m glad they got GRIT involved. The last time I remember med students putting on a race was the old Strides for Health, in like 2010. The race course was kind of chaotic and it was a minor miracle we stayed on the non-certified route. The med student director thought a) it was a great idea to run it in June and b) run the race himself despite being the director too. Being a typical med student overachiever, he went all out and then everybody got to practice their EMT skills as he passed out and required an ambulance to take him away. Fortunately, he was ok, but damn, dude.
But Erin was sure to avoid that epic cluster from happening again. The new race has actually been run pretty smoothly, though the med student directed years featured “top 2 overall” awards and nothing else. I was assured there would be standard 3 deep this year. Packet pickup was at Craft and Draft, and while there wasn’t free beer, at least I couldn’t complain with a portion of the proceeds going towards Curing Kids Cancer. Plus, it was a step up from the 1980s American macrobrew vibe of Nightcaps. However, I did miss the nostalgia of cigarette vending machines and Miller light.
Showing up on race day, things were not looking good. It was ridiculously hot. After a couple of weekends with temps barely clearing 60 in the morning, Saturday was 71 when I got there an hour early. After a Friday dinner of tikka masala, a couple of IPAs and a night of trash sleeping, my warmup turned into a combo of 11-minute slog jog miles and a game of find an open bathroom. Sadly, my 1998 student ID didn’t work on the other med school entrances, so I was forced to use the regular bathrooms for the race. Ugh. They even had a med student volunteer blocking the hallway to go further into the building. I thought about exercising my inexhaustible privilege and entitlement to push past him but decided against it. I do have poop performance anxiety with people waiting though. I’ll put it in the next DSM.
I did a couple of miles with Lady Godby and although the course seemed pretty flat, I was already soaked in sweat. Damn you Summer, part III. There was a huge crowd at the start and lots of Hammond XC runners, so I was already working myself up in a Debbie Downer funk about not even winning anything. But hey, usually I feel like trash at the start of what ends up being a really good race.
With the gun, all the kids take off like a bat out of hell, and we begin a winding route through the campus behind the main building. I’m not more than a quarter mile in and I feel like an absolute wreck. The sun is beating down, my legs feel like brick, the whole nine yards. Everyone is ahead of me, including Artis, who appears he’s going to make this the day he finally beats his geriatric-giant-headed-chunky-boy nemesis.
We then get thrown out onto Byron rd. which is essentially flat and straight. I kind of mail it in for a while, settling in behind Shannon, hoping I’ll catch my breath and feel better. Mile one in 6:26, so basically right at 20-minute pace, which isn’t too bad. The problem is, I just want to quit. Heart rate is too high and I’m really laboring for some reason. I assume it’s the heat. JLybrand is out on a corner with her kids so I decide I can’t bail out in front of them.
Finally, we make it to the turnaround on Parrott avenue and head back on Wordsworth. I manage to draw even with Shannon and maybe I can justify dropping out at 2 miles if I make it that far. We get back onto Byron, which is a little bit of a psychological boost and I zone out for a bit until mile 2 chirps back at 6:37. I feel terrible but I, incorrectly, think I may be first male masters, so I soldier on. The heat is awful, and I am sucking a lot of wind. I can see Artis way up ahead and I’m already thinking of how happy he’ll be to finally kick my ass. But hold the phone… I may me gaining on him just a bit. No, it’s probably me hallucinating in my half-delirium. I start to see the front of the pack turn back into the campus ahead. I’m off in la la land again for a while, and then I see McFall is still ahead of me. I swear I thought I passed him back. And Artis is definitely starting to get reeled in.
Dammit, I’m going to hate myself if I don’t give it a try. As soon as we hit the campus, I throw down hard. And man it hurts. I can tell McFall is probably out if reach, but every step I’m gaining on Mr. Love. I ramp it up to full Blue Shoe kick mode and blast by him near the parking garage. I’m so wrecked that I am not 100 percent sure I can keep this up for the only 200 meters or so left. Luckily the course is completely flat and falls down a notch heading into the chute area. I blast through the finish in 20:14 and immediately make sweet love to the grass nearby. HR was 180 according to Garmin at the finish, so I suppose I took the race’s name very literally. Not my best, but it was all I had on a crap day, so I will take it. Good enough for 2nd masters, 10th overall. Cool plates for overall winners and cups for age groupers. But the best prize is another few weeks of living rent-free in Artis’ head.
In the overall, David Chen crushed a 17:25 for the win, with Charlie Krause 2nd. Michael “FLYING V” Visser claimed 3rd in a PR 18:02 after just getting a PR at Light Up for Leah the night before. On the ladies’ side, Sofia Baker, Emme Crosland and Simone Handfield swept the podium. Women’s masters winners were Shawanna White, just a second off the overall podium, with Shannon Godby second. Amy Magee was 3rd. Jonathan McFall whipped my tail for first male masters and Jerry Vaca was 3rd.
Female age groupers: Sara McFall won the 35-39, with Amanda Smyrl 3rd. Ashleigh Carpenter won the 40-44. Noel Schuch won the 50-54 with Clara Beaudet 3rd. Sherry Fadel won the 55-59. Lisa Powell won the 60-64. Lisa Smarr and Margie Shelburg went 1-2 in the 65-69. Martha Aultman won the 75+.
Male age groupers: Finn Jaworek was 2nd in the 10-15. Artis Love won the 30-34 in 20:29. Antjuan Seawright was 2nd in the 40-44. Jon Baysden and Patrick Hall went 1-2 in the 45-49. Michael Smyrl was 2nd and Michael Beaudet 3rd in the 50-54. Phil Smith was 2nd in the 60-65 in his comeback and Son Nguyen 3rd . Lorand Batten won the 65-69. Gerald Harmon, Robbie McClam and Pete Poore won the 70-75. Richard Wright won the 75+
Notable finishers: Jim Fadel, Hayden Hall, Rusty Painter, Cassidy Carter, Drew Dickerson, Sarah Soltau, Wendy Homeyer, Nicki Charlton, Maddie Homeyer, Ben Homeyer, Heather Herndon and Mikki Barthelemy. Please let me know if I forgot anyone -drachtungbaby@yahoo.com
Pics from JP photograpy, collages by Tracy Tisdale in the CRC newsletter
The Springdale 5k has been a mainstay on the Blue Shoes calendar since its inception in 2009. It started out an evening race (Springdale at Sunset 5k) in late August, run entirely on the grass horse track used for the Colonial Cup. Apparently, the original directors neglected to understand that August evenings in the Midlands are exceedingly unpleasant for running , and oh yeah, no one mows the grass in the horse racing off season. I high-stepped through ankle-length grass and about died in 95-degree heat in that first race. For those interested, there is a video on YouTube. My Sasquatch ass lumbers through around the 23-minute mark, desperately blue shoeing Chad Long with a race face for the ages.
Fortunately, Erin took over this race several years later and moved it a few weeks later, on the roads and in the morning. While lacking the uniqueness factor of the horse track, it was a hell of a lot easier to run. Easier, but not easy though. It runs through a neighborhood called Kirkover HILLS, so this should be your first red flag. The course is a simple loop but basically drops you down for a mile and a half, and then climbs you right back up. I will say the way back up is more gradual, but it’s pretty relentless. Definitely not a course you want to blast out hard in the beginning. At least there’s a waffle bar at the finish and golden horse trophies to ease your pain. This course is tough but generally plays to my negative split favor. Especially in 2021 when the top 3 dudes blew through a turn and left me behind to win the overall. Hey, I take holy grails any way I can get them. Just don’t ask Eric Masaitis or Steve Greer about it. Too soon.
So, this is race number 4 on the Blue Shoes comeback trail. It’s been a fat boy summer, so while the quad is mostly better, the food baby is still gestating. I’ve managed to drop my times from 21:22 to 20:08 in the last few weeks, so maybe there’s hope. I knew this race was not going to be fast with the course, so I was aiming to maybe make the masters podium. I show up an hour early and I am in full Debbie Downer mode. The second faux fall we were having gave way to third summer and it’s already 70 degrees at 7 am. Fabulous. Also, Friday night IPAs and whatever the hell I had for dinner are wreaking a category 5 colonic hurricane. I did my mile warmup trot and had thoroughly convinced myself this was going to be a disaster. Wah wah.
But as I made my way to the start, there were no elite guys to be found. A few kids and some young frat bro looking dudes, but no Jarvis types. Damn, I wish I wasn’t injured and fat. Shannon and Shawanna are on hand to battle it out for the women’s race. TONS of CRCers out there. The CRC team, captained by Margie Shelburg, stood at 41 at last check. We already had the team win in the bag, despite a valiant effort from the huge Clyburn family, who had over 30 runners.
The start of this race is pretty nuts. It’s flat down Knights Hill rd before turning right on Carter Street for a plunge down a mountain. Frat dudes take an early lead with Shawanna close behind. Shannon passes me and a bunch of young guys. There is one dude with a touch of grey in his hair and I latch on to him and Lady Godby. I’m pretty terrible at downhills and the early going of races in general, so this is rough for me. I start picking up Debbie Downer vibes and keep thinking about how we’re all going to have to make up this ground on the way back. We finally turn right off of Carter Street and mile 1 comes back in 6:21. Yikes. It is downhill, but now I’m afraid I’ve overcooked it. I’m still running in a pretty big pack at this time. I can still make out the leader ahead, but I’m probably sitting probably 8-10th place, which definitely opens the door for some rogue 40 year old to steal my old man glory. Mile 2 is largely at the bottom of the hill and I’m just trying to keep pace with everyone else. We pass the fateful turn of 2021 and here we go up the hill again. It’s clear to me a lot of these guys didn’t know the course because all of a sudden, the pack is dropping like flies. I pull up even with Masterish guy and he latches on me like a caboose. To be fair, my chunky boy physique is great to draft off of. Mile 2 is 6:42, so an expected slowdown. I don’t feel terrible though, and it feels good to be making ground against the field. My pre-race slog jog was a half mile out-and-back from the finish, so pretty soon I can see the turnaround point of the warmup. I start ramping up the pace, but then I realized I was wrong. I was well over a half mile out. Oh well, I already pushed the chips in, so here goes. I start flailing away and my good feeling from mile 2 goes out the window. But there is a masters dude on my tail and I can’t let him take me down. Jennfer Ward and Betsy Long are leading a cheering section and taking pics, so I of course have to momentarily pose for them. I manage to catch Shawanna, Shannon and some guy in a football jersey in the span of about 100 meters, but I can’t shake the feeling that masters guy is lurking just behind me. Suddenly I realize I’m also holding down 3rd with number 2 just up ahead. I try to crank it up another notch, but the heart and lungs aren’t having it. Finally, I see the horse crossing sign and the little library, my signs that we’re at the last turn. I blast out whatever I have into my kick, hoping my pics won’t be too horrible. Crossed the line in 20:28 and hit the grass immediately. Totally gassed. But hey, I will take a 3rd place and an overall podium any day.
In the overall, 21-year-olds Jordan Greenblatt (19:25) and Coleman Bland (20:19) finished 1st and 2nd. Shannon Godby and Shawanna White were tops on the women’s podium, with Sarah Carroway 3rd. Top male masters were John Campolongo, Nathan McKinney and Whitney Keen. Women’s masters winners included Nikki Barthelemy, Ronda Sanders and Rita Hipp.
Ladies’ age group honor roll: Hayden Hall won the 15-19, while Jennifer Carruth won the 30-34. Jennifer Thomas won the 35-39 , with Amanda Smyrl 3rd. Ashley Carpenter was champ of the 40-44. Amanda Holland was 3rd in the 45-49. Shenequa Coles and Angie Thames were first and third in the 50-54. Colleen Towery, Lisa Powell and Torill Nelson won the 60-64. Melody Kreling, Beverly Breuer and Lisa Smarr swept the 65-69. Helene Lipe was champion of the 70-74.
Men’s age group honor roll: Antjuan Seawright and Nic Collins were 1-2 in the 40-44. Michael Smyrl, Drew Dickerson and Michael Beaudet swept the 50-54. Tony Yarborough, Clay Ham and Joe Roof claimed the 60-64. Lorand Batten was 2nd in the 65-69. George Cassidy and Pete Poore were 1-2 in the 70-74. Alex Ponomarev was 3rd in the 75+.
Notable Finishers: Cotton Carroway, Clara Beaudet, Paul Laymon, Lance Towery, Mary Cassidy, Teresa Shelton, Deana Rennick, Hou-Yin Chang, Rich Wright, Nicki Charlton, Traci Smith, Heather Herndon, Jennifer Reeves, Jamie Zug, Karen Vidra-Zug, Ron Lipe and Margie Shelburg.
The Crawdaddy Dash is associated with the Rosewood Crawfish Festival, an event put on by the Rosewood Merchants Association to raise money for their group and the neighborhood in general. The Dash is a rarity – a zombie race resurrected from the dead. It got its start in the early 2010s and lasted for several years. This was my favorite era of the festival, featuring washed up 90s bands reliving their glory years. Also good for aging middle-aged dads doing the same. I may or may not have been drunkly fangirling Everclear in the first row in 2015. But the race kind of petered out and died around 2019. Luckily, Erin Roof and GRIT came along to conjure the ghosts of 5ks past and the new Dash restarted in 2024. The course was the same and the start/finish (and Friday packet pickup) was at the Hunter Gatherer Hangar, so what wasn’t to love? I was asked to revive the infamous crawdaddy boxers, my “costume” from the early years of the race. Jury is still out whether they promote the race or drive people away.
Last year’s revival was a success, but I was concerned about this year, as there were literally five Tour de Columbia races on the same day. Luckily, between CRC single and double dippers and some advertising, the event still had about 350 registered. Not too shabby. Must’ve been the boxers, obviously.
2017ish2018
I showed up to the race my typical hour in advance and briefly considered pulling an entitled parking spot, but the shame from True to the Brew was still fresh. No hi-vis vest guys, but I figured City Roots or somebody might have my car towed. So I hoofed it from Memorial Stadium a (gasp) quarter mile away. I still tried to negotiate a prime memorial stadium toilet, but it appeared the powers-that-be knew intrepid poopers would be on the loose. The place was locked up tight. Oh well, still plenty of portapotties at the actual start/finish. I had opted for the race shirt to go with my boxers, but again I had failed to look at the weather. Almost 70 degrees and humid. I considered changing into a singlet, but I couldn’t deny the perfect color coordination of the boxer crawdads and the race shirt. Alas, I must suffer for my art.
Melinda’s photo with Deana
After carpet bombing the portapotty, I surveyed the field. Looked like a pretty fast group. Much to my masters and age group chagrin, bionic 45-year-old David Abel and veteran 49 year old beast Phil Midden were there, likely detonating any chance I had at a masters trophy. Of course, even my age group was questionable, since my gimpy knee has trashed the last two months of training. At least March had aged me up to 50 so now my competition was a little easier.
Credit: JP photography
After multiple start line selfies for full effect, we were off. This race is all about navigating the first mile. It’s almost all uphill, though it sets you up for a gloriously downhill second mile and fairly flat third. Coming out of the blocks, my knee is still a little tight, so I debate back and forth whether to mail this one in or go all out. I kind of split the difference and choose something comfortably hard. The climb to Rosewood is no joke, especially that little bump as you turn left on Holly in front of the park. The rest of the way up is fairly shady and I reminisce about the one Rosewood house with the wonderful “herbal” parties of 1995. Ah, memories.. I get knocked back into reality as we hit Rosewood and back out into the blazing sun. At least it’s flat. I hit mile 1 in 7:05, which is about a minute off what I’d like to be doing, but it’s been a fat boy spring. Rosewood is flattish to downhill, but the real roller coaster begins on Ott. It’s just a freefall all the way to Owens field. I turn to my gravitational advantage and start my butt rolling down the mountain. I had been chasing Artis, but now I’m gaining on him and yep, he’s getting passed again. I live rent free in Mr. Love’s head, and I just renewed the lease. Mile 2 is just before the Live Oak rd. cross street, 6:40ish split. I feel ok at this point and the knee is loose, but Ott bottoms out at Jim Hamilton Blvd for that long stretch to the finish. While it looks fairly flat, it is slightly uphill, and that sun is out with a vengeance. Any good vibes of mile 2 go out the window pretty quickly. I can see the YERG up ahead and I try to mount a chase. Pace is getting hotter but so is the oven that is this cotton race shirt. Damn my exquisite fashion sense. I try to blast a blue shoes kick but my gimp legs and food baby belly are vetoing that decision. Comfortably hard becomes headless chicken pretty fast though as I make the turn and still see the 20s on the clock. Alas, it is not to be. All the years of teasing Tyler McGaha (where are you, Tyler??) about his “blackjack” 5ks comes back to haunt me. The house wins, and I go over – 21:02. But hey, the knee feels ok and I’m in one piece, so I will take it. Luckily David and Phil are so damn fast they placed 2nd and 3rd overall, leaving the rest of us for masters scraps. I got 2nd behind the Yerg, so happy with that. The overall/masters awards are super nice crawdad stenciled pottery plates made by Jessica Hall, wife of Pat. Thanks, Jessica!
Overall/masters trophy
In the male overall, Jamie Sires took the win in 16:42 over masters beasts David Abel (17:10) and Phil Midden (18:05). Ashley Graham took the women’s win in 19:46, with Sierra Jaeger 2nd and Emily Hernandez 3rd. In female masters, Nikki Barthelemy took the win with Rebecca Goings 2nd and the ageless Carol Wallace 3rd. In male masters, Robert Yerger was the champion.
Female age group honor roll: Julia Ghering was 2nd in the 25-29. Sarah Carroway was tops in the 35-39. Lauren Duck was champion of the 40-44. Brie McGrievy won the 45-49, while Deana Rennick and Melinda Waldrop went 1-3 in the 50-54. Coleen Strasburger told me she was number 1 at the finish and indeed claimed the 60-64. Beverly Breuer, Margaret Ghering (Julia’s mom) and Diane Freeman claimed the 65-69 podium. Martha Aultman won the 75+ with her dog in tow.
Male age group honor roll: Regan Freeman was 2nd in the 25-29, with Bruce Edmonds 3rd. Artis Love finished 3rd in the 30-34. Nic Collins was champion of the 40-44. Jon Baysden and Pat Hall were top 2 in the 45-49. Ivery Baldwin was 2nd in the 50-54. Leighton McClendon took 3rd in the 55-59. Clay Ham and Jeff Radenbaugh were1-3 in the 60-64. Luther Kemmerlin won the 70-74, and Ron Hagell and Rich Wright were top 2 in the 75+.
Other notable finishers: Pavel Mosneaguta, Phil Smith, Stefanie Hauser, Makenzie Wilt, Kelly Danias, Stevie Dee Dukes, Cassidy Carter, Sellers Valimohamed, Waverly Duck and Tee Coker.
The True to the Brew 10k is the original gangsta of the True to the Brew series, which started in 2018. This race is technically a trail event, though it’s held on the remnants of an old railroad bed, so it’s actually flat and fast. It is one of the few point-to-point courses on the Tour de Columbia, and starts at Wilson’s Grocery in Pomaria . The course follows the Peak-to-Pomaria segment of the Palmetto Trail in reverse, ending with the bridge crossing across the Broad River. The trailhead afterparty is known for the free beer and breakfast, so it’s always been a stop on the Tour de Blue Shoes calendar, basically because I’m up for beer at any time of day.
I always sign up for this race way in advance, so of course I’m injured. I am still nursing a bit of a knee issue, so yeah, pounding out a 10k on a rocky trail sounds like a great idea. But no one has FOMO like I have FOMO. I decided to still run it, though maybe at 75 percent. Hopefully it wouldn’t wreck me. My usual taxi for the event, the McGrievys, were out galivanting in California, so luckily Jeff Curran and his wife Nicole were on board to help with transportation. It should be noted that there are a couple of large buses to shuttle people back to the start, and carpooling is completely unnecessary, but at least it makes me feel important. Packet pickup at Craft and Draft is always on point with a free beer with your bib. I even took the CRC first lady emeritus this time, though I might have bribed her with a Mr. Friendly’s date to follow. It’s only fair for her having to deal with runner talk.
We agreed to meet at 7:15 at Peak pharmacy , drop off my car there, and drive to the start. I have a confession to make – I typically blatantly disregard the established race parking (a half mile from the start) and pull up to the Wilson’s grocery parking lot in my typical aura of CRC ex-president/GRIT spokesmodel entitlement. I told Jeff to pull in the start line lot and ACT LIKE YOU BELONG. There were a few hi-vis vest guys directing traffic. Ruh roh. I told Jeff DON’T MAKE EYE CONTACT. We pull into a spot, and dammit hi-vis vest guy is following us. OH NO. He asks Jeff is he’s a runner or volunteer. SAY VOLUNTEER, JEFF. Nope. DOH! We were banished to the distant parking lot with the other commoners. CURSES. Again, there are shuttles to and from the parking area and it’s a half mile downhill walk to the start, so absolutely no reason for being an entitled prick, but hey, that’s kind of my trademark.
Gretchen’s selfie
I warmed up with the walk and a solo gimp jog for about a mile. The knee seemed OK, whispering “maybe this isn’t the best idea” versus screaming at me in obscenities like many of my other injuries. I strolled up to the start and conditions were pretty ideal – 59 degrees and little wind. Pretty big crowd on hand since the race sold out, with a big CRC contingent despite the popular Vertex pump and run going on the same day. Tanner was probably hoping for the win, but Without Limits had some singlet guy that looked pretty fast, and there was some master-ish guy with what looked like a sponsored singlet on, so that’s never a good sign. Shannon looked to be a good bet for the ladies’ podium, but there were some random women there I had never seen before. I still toed the line like I’m fast, but I know very well this is not the case right now.
Credit: JP photography
Sure enough, I’m getting passed left and right at the start as I try to settle into a comfortably hard pace. Knee is whispering again, but I’m hoping it will hush its mouth. The course is flat but you’re always having to maneuver over rocks, so at least every part of my knee is getting equally beat up. I clock mile 1 around 7:22, so not too bad. The knee has loosened up some, and I focus on keeping Frank Seier as a pacer, since he’s just ahead of me. The next mile or so I’m able to settle into that comfortably hard zone. The scenery is pretty much the same throughout the course so I start drifting into the usual dark and twisty things in my mind. Suddenly, this younger dude comes up and tells me “NICE CADENCE” and passes me. I assume this is an alternative version of “NICE JOB” and is superficially a compliment, but I wholeheartedly interpret as a HA HA EFF YOU OLD MAN. OH HELL, I’m getting a “GOOD JOB” from some rando. He keeps going and I decide to latch on. We pass Frank and end up separating out, crossing the 3 mile mark road together.
The next 3 miles are pretty much the same. I’m chasing cadence boy and there’s no one else around. Pace picks up into the 7:15 ish range. Knee is whispering soft nothings by this point. The only real course difference is the underpass and hill back up to the trail at around 5 miles. I can smell the finish by this point, and I seriously consider blasting out a headless chicken to pass this guy. Definitely having fantasies of “HOW’S THS CADENCE??” while blowing by him. But one, that’s probably a really bad idea, especially on a wood slatted bridge, and two, my fitness is trash and I’m pretty beat anyway. There’s no one behind me, so I coast the last quarter of a mile across the bridge and finish in a shade over 45 minutes. Good for 17th overall, and thanks to my newly advanced age, first in the 50-54! I guess getting old is good for something. I drowned out any further protesting by my knee in IPAs and an egg/bacon sandwich. Not a bad morning!
Credit Jp photography
In the overall, WOL singlet dude Jake Skory torched the field by over five minutes in 36:16. Kevin McMullen, who I think was Mr. Fit masters guy at the start, finished second in 41:38, while Tanner was just behind in 41:46 for third.
Among the ladies, Shannon Godby crushed a 43:46 for first with Leah Austin 2nd and JK Sipes 3rd. In male masters, Brian Mincel took the win with Brett Martin 2ndand John O’Brien 3rd. Jessica Weems took 1st masters among the women, with Carol Anne Wright 2nd and Marian Nanny 3rd.
Women’s Age group honor roll: Hayden Hall was 3rd in the 14 and under. Lauren Duck was 2nd in the 40-44. Kristin Wallace won the 45-49. Jennifer McLeod, Angie Thames and Deanna Rennick swept the 50-54. Dawn Fellers was second in the 55-59. Lisa Powell was 1st and Teresa Harrington 3rd in the 60-64. Meldoy Kreiling won the 65-69 by a mere 13 minutes.
Men’s Age group honor roll: Bruce Edmonds took first in the 25-29. Trey McCain was second in the 35-39. Micah Simonen was champ of the 45-49. Frank Seier and Ed Aufuldish went 1-2 in the 55-59. Joe Roof was champion of the 60-64. Jerry Rich, Leeds Barroll and Harry Strick rounded out an all CRC 70-74 podium.
Other notable finishers: Thomas Outlaw, Jeff Curran, Daniel Mosher, Marty Wentzel, Nicole Matros, Ken Walker, Son Nguyen, Missy Caughman, Michael and Clara Beaudet, Gretchen Lambert, Kelly Danias, Rick Gibbons, Sara Kozar, Loids Leaburn, Pam Griffin, Patrick Hall, Stevie Dee Dukes, Traci Smith, Pete Poore, Karen Vidra-Zug, Jamie Zug and Margie Shelburg. Sorry for the people I missed – please let me know if you’re not mentioned! drachtungbaby@yahoo.com
Montage: Tracy Tisdale/CRC newsletter pics by JP photography
The True to the Brew 5k is a brand-new race that’s been added to the existing TTTB series to promote the Palmetto Trail in South Carolina. The existing races include the original 10k on the Peak to Pomaria segment and the half marathon in Croft State park in Spartanburg. The TTTB 5k was devised to highlight the Capital City part of the PT, which runs through the heart of downtown Columbia, including the Riverfront, Laurel, Main, Sumter and Wheat streets. GRIT director Erin Roof, in the planning stages of this project, had asked me for some potential routes, provided they start/end at the PT headquarters on King Street and utilize some part of the trail. I devised what I thought was a really unique 5 miler that wrapped around the State house and came back. It sounds cool on paper, but in retrospect the Blue Shoes Hilly AF 5 miler from hell with several hundred feet of elevation gain and multiple major road crossings was probably not the best option. As it turns out, my tastes are not for everyone. Just ask my Sunday morning crew and their always ill-fated decision to have me lead. I will find every miserable hill in this city if allowed. This is the way.
Luckily for you, GRIT and PT exec director Mary Roe decided on a rectangle in Shandon that was considerably more pleasant to run. It does utilize the Wheat Street section and most importantly the PT headquarters, where the afterparty was to be held. If free beer and burgers are involved, then you don’t have to twist my arm to show up. I arrived my standard hour in advance and found myself parking in front of what must have been some wild bro party on Lee St. the night before, since there were still a few douchey guys out front amped up on presumably red bull and vodka, +/- some nose candy. There was a lot of woooooing and I decided to avoid eye contact. My legs were still kind of trashed from the Dam to Dam relay the week before, and I did a couple miles of warmup with Silent H and Drew Williams, along with spectators Hicks and Joyce. Luckily there were ample portapotties since my colon kept talking to me for additional encore performances. Temps were warmish but not too bad, low 60s, with some wind.
Always finding the camera
Start line was on King Street out in front of the PT headquarters. A quick look around was notable for no super elites on the men’s or women’s side. Nobody seemed to be paying attention to the photographer, so I made sure to pose in my new olive green Stitch Fix race shirt, which is long enough to cover my freakish torso and first trimester food baby. If Sarah has moved on from pageants, then someone has to be the diva. I couldn’t tell who was winning this race for the guys, but it seemed pretty clear Shannon had it in the bag for the ladies, though her pre-race fall made her look like she got in a fight with the pavement. But hey, If you’re bleeding, it does add to the bad-ass intimidation factor. GRIT family Parker Roof seemed to be the favorite to win the overall, though there were a couple of teens and a fit-looking masters dude in a singlet that might crash his trophy hunt.
The start was less chaotic with the non-elite field, but apparently, I must have gotten a contact high from the frat bros because I was going hard as a MF for some reason. Drew told me he was glad I was in a different AG now, but I had to inform him, at 5:30ish pace, that I was still 49 until Monday. Grandmasters will have to wait until next week. We turn on Wheat and I try to rein in the effort a bit, because I’m breathing way too hard out of the gates. Up ahead is Parker and masters singlet dude and one other young guy. The pace car is right there so between that, my giant ego and Drew’s elephant footclomps behind me, I am probably not backing off sufficiently. Sure enough, mile 1 (Wheat and Ravenel corner) comes back in 6:06. Yikes. But then giant ego brain convinces me that maybe, just maybe, I’m in that kind of shape now. It should be noted that I run 99 out of 100 5ks with negative splits, so this was not my usual.
JEDI runner pics from mile 2.5
We make the turnround on Prospect and it’s a relief to at least be heading back towards home. It feels like I’ve put a gap on the field behind me and so it’s basically just me and Parker out for a run in Shandon. There’s a nice downhill drift on Monroe for a while, but there’s also a headwind, which doesn’t bode well for my less than aerodynamic physique. Mile 2 comes back in 6:11, which would be exciting, since it’s only a few seconds off sub-19 pace. Unfortunately, the cocaine-like push at the start is beginning to exact its toll. And bad. There are hardly any hills to speak of on this route but somehow just the slightest inclines start to feel like Marlboro St on Sunday mornings. I’m really struggling, and I even start doing mental math as to how much WALKING I could do and still keep my position. But I have no idea how much distance I have on the field, and then here comes Tracy taking pics. OMG, I would never hear the end of it catching the walksies in a JEDI photo. So I soldier on, despite the fact I’m ready to give birth to my lungs through my chest. At the turn onto King, I see Parker look back and I know he’s having nightmares of a pasty almost-50-year old chunky boy take his ass down in front of literally his whole family. And while I would relish the chance to exact such unbearable shame, my body is adamantly vetoing that idea. The wheels are falling off and I am sucking wind like there’s no tomorrow. Just wrecked. Luckily, I can make out the finish from forever away, which gives me a goal, but man, there is no blue shoe kick today. I even have to back it off a couple of times so the brain in the giant melon head can get enough oxygen. Parker avoids disaster and crosses the line right at 19:00, while I muster the last bit of effort to crash across the finish in 19:17, complete with an HYC style collapse in front of PT headquarters. OK, so that was not the best strategy. But the time isn’t too far off from the 19:10 at Run for the Saints when it was 40 degrees colder. I’ll take it.
Running on empty
Post race party was even better than I thought – burgers (meat and black bean), hot dogs, chicken salad sandwiches, chips and of course free Palmetto trail beer. Craft and Draft was also selling some additional brews. Awards were steel growlers for overall and masters, and because fit masters singlet guy took 2nd, I got to revel at the top of the podium for my masters “win”. Hey, I’ll take what I can get. And a new chapter of grandmaster Blue Shoes starts this week. Watch out, fellow AARP members.
COLUMBIA RUNNING CLUB GROUP PIC (Calico photography)
In the overall, Douglas Nover took the win in 17:38, with “fit masters dude” Craig Wiltshire taking 2nd in his first sub 18, 17:51. Nice work, Craig. Parker took 3rd in 19 flat. Not surprisingly, Shannon took home the women’s win in 20:39. Not too shabby for 52, especially after getting your ass kicked by the asphalt. What was surprising was Korinne Collins taking TWO MINUTES off her 5k PR to claim 2nd in 21:33. WHO DOES THAT? Absolutely incredible. Though I will note she has followed my Sunday morning hill nightmares on multiple occasions, so this is her reward. Sellers Valimohamed continues her comeback to racing with a 3rd overall finish in 22:44.
In the female masters division, Courtney Givens took first in 22:58, while ageless CRC legend Melody Kreiling placing 2nd. Krystle Gregory from Summerville was 3rd. Male masters was won by an olive green menace named Alex McDonald, with Drew Williams and Jeffrey Campbell third, all under 20 minutes. Middle aged men are brutal.
Age group honor roll: In the 11-14, Hayden Hall took 1stplace while Lauren Carpenter won 2nd in the 15-19. Michaela Willoughby was third in the 25-29. Meredith Frye was 2nd in the 30-34. Ashleigh Carpenter was 2nd in the 40-44 women, while Marty Wentzel and Adam Fisher were 2-3 among the men. Brie McGrievy was 2nd in the 45-49 women. Micah Simonsen was 1st and Jon Baysden 3rd among the men. Amanda Lyons and Kana Rahman went 1-2 in the 50-54. The 55-59 group featured Lynda Leonardi and Sara Wilcox topping the women’s division and Randall “SILENT H” Hrechko and president Roy Shelley winning the men’s division. Phil Smith captured the 60-64 men’s crown while Pam Griffin and Lisa Powell went 2-3 among the women. Beverly Breuer, Mary Cassidy and Lisa Smarr swept the 65-69 women’s podium, while George Cassidy, Jerry Rich and Pete Poore did the same among the 70-74 men. Martha Aultman and Brigitte Smith were 1-2 in the 75+ women while Alex Ponomarev and Ken Lowden claimed the top two spots among the men.
Other notable finishers (I tried my best to include everyone, let me know if I missed anybody, also would love to meet new CRC members) : Patrick Hall (whose Dog Daze company also sponsored the race), Ted and Anna Hewitt, Webster Lyons, Violet Beets, Katherine Meyers, Bertha Woehl, Leighton McClendon, Sarah Soltau, Joanna Holden, Missy Caughman, Deana Rennick, uiGretchen Lambert, Shiela Bolin, Clara Beaudet, Teresa Harrington, Lois Leaburn, Makenzie Wilt, Harry Strick, Maria Pray, Traci Smith, Andrea Bowman, Kristin Wallace, Karen Vidra-Zug, Dianne Steadman, Heather Herndon, Dianne Freeman, Jonathan Kozar and Sara Kozar.
Calico photography /montage from Tracy Tisdale/CRC newsletter
The Cupid’s Chase 5k has been put on for about a decade and is one of 48 similar races across the country put on by Community Options. Community Options helps fund programs and housing for people with disabilities, so obviously a good cause. It’s held in Maxcy Gregg park and features a fairly fast out and back course through Shandon. While known for being on the pricey side, the race has a reputation for some awesome awards and door prizes.
I missed last week’s Be the Buffalo, so it didn’t take long for me to develop a bad case of the FOMOs and generalized race withdrawal. Cupid’s was the only race this weekend, so I hoped it would bring out all the hardcore CRCers already out there scrounging for 2025 points even before they get their 2024 plaque. Greedy bastards (me included). The registration was a little steep at 45 bucks but fortunately this esteemed publication had a discount code. READ YOUR NEWSLETTER, PEOPLE.
For better or worse, Cupid’s also starts at 10 am, so plenty of time to sleep late and get ready. I always appreciate ample time for my dramatic colon to play out its typical three act play on race mornings. I get there an hour early and it looks like a decent crowd. Weather is nice though crazy warm for February, 60ish. True to form, Cupid’s race packet has a Nike tech shirt with $22 tag still on it. Not too shabby. I even wore it to the race because apparently, I’m a notal noob.
Silent H and I slog jogged a few miles and checked out his new Honda, even though it made me sad with the recent death of my prized 2005 pilot with all the race stickers. Rest easy, big blue. One surprise encore for my colon and everybody starts lining up. The crowd is sizable but no Hunter (aka 2024 SC male runner of the year) or other super elites. Tanner is on hand, and I say he might have the W on this one. There are some pesky high school kids though, so that’s always a wild card. After my start line selfie, I look over and see Phil Midden. OH NO. Like OJ Striggles, Phil is exactly my age and a far superior runner, as well as a long-time destroyer of my trophy hunting hopes. He rarely races, but when he shows up, he gives me a good beat down. Oh well.
So I should really break this race down into three separate dramas.
1) THE TURN. This course is a simple out and back, with the first part straight up Blossom until you turn on Amherst. Nothing super surprising in the early going. I paced with J-Ly early and Tanner and a group of kids led the way up ahead. I powered up the hill and I’m focused on getting my breathing back when I spot some chaos up ahead. The lead cop car appears to stop suddenly, back up and then turn on Sims. Everyone in the lead pack follows the car. OH NO. I hate misdirects. I’m the next runner and I have a crisis of conscience. Well, I’d like to call it a crisis of conscience. More like a “what should I do so have a chance at that sweet CC swag”. I could run the right course, but we’re only a block or two from the turnaround. Community Options is not exactly a bunch of USATF road racing officials, so a slightly short course is probably not going to result in the lead pack getting DQ’d. Where is HYC when you need him?? The thought of being the lead guy to run the right course and getting a win on a technicality does cross my mind, though. Ultimately, I decided running a 4k today doesn’t sound too bad , so I turn on Sims too.
2) ON PATROL LIVE. After I make the turn, I realize this is even shorter than I thought. I’m all in my head, knowing my time is going to be useless, and Phil has probably stolen my swag already anyway. I’m awakened from my Debbie downer episode when some dude in an SUV takes a hard turn onto the course, followed by a scream of some choice words by the cop managing the intersection. I’m about to cross when I see the cop jump in his car, flip his blue lights and haul ass down Wheat to go get the SUV guy. I look both ways at the intersection, which is a little hard to do when you’re pulling 5k pace as an albino sasquatch. Thankfully any other cars there decide they don’t want to get arrested for vehicular manslaughter either. I didn’t see the aftermath, but H reported he saw the SUV guy in handcuffs. Dayum.
3) AMBULANCE FOR ARTIS. So I burn down Blossom as hard as I could, but the two high schoolers in front of me are not going to let a near grandmasters chunky boy chase them down. We approach the finish line and see the clock flip over to the 17s. Yeah, this is super short. I hit the finish in 17:17, Garmin has 2.75 miles. Extrapolate the pace and consider a touch of Blue Shoe Kick and it’s probably about a 19:15. Not too bad. Not too long after, I’m jibba jabbing at the finish when I hear a scream and some brakes. Apparently, Artis Love came crashing through the finish and took a hard right, fearing a Kobayashi style “reversal of fortune”, aka puke. Only problem is that the finish is on Blossom st with an active right lane. A car brakes hard and Artis seemed to take a side swipe from the mirror. I went running over. Because everyone wants a psychiatrist as their first responder. THOUGH WE ARE M.D.s, DAMMIT. Sorry, got triggered. Luckily, he seemed ok, though I’m sure the adrenaline was high. The kid who hit him stopped and was appropriately freaked but he was glad Artis was all right. We walked Artis back to a chair by the finish, when I guess the RD decided to call in the cavalry. A fire truck and an ambulance with lights and sirens showed up and planted themselves right in front of the finish line. Dude got a level 1 trauma response for a bruised hip. Luckily Artis got checked out and was able to walk around later, though I’m sure he was sore the next day.
But, even with all the 911 action, let’s get to the important part – THE AWARDS. Cupid’s Chase awards are usually awesome, but totally random and highly variable. I swear someone will get a 100 dollar gift certificate while the next age group will be a key chain and a pen. I moved back into Debbie Downer mode for the awards until I heard the glorious announcement of the 3rd place overall PHIL MIDDEN. YESSSS. I call this “PULLING AN OJ”, where you get a consolation age group win because the real fastest guy got pulled up to the overall/masters. Some would be ashamed of this victory, but it’s safe to say, between flying elbows, turkey costumes and incessant poop talk, I HAVE ZERO SHAME. I got some rechargable running lights for my efforts, which, while not $100, was better than Julia’s candle collection.
In the overall, Douglas Nover and Justin Meza took the top 2 spots over my age group nemesis Phil Midden. Hannah Hilal and Meredith Moyer took the top 2 women’s spots, with Jennifer Lybrand third.
Age group honor roll: Finn Jaworek won the 2-12 boys. Jordan Seeger won the 20-24. Sellers Valimohamed and Julia Ghering took the top 2 in the 25-29. Artis survived his trauma for 1st in the 30-34. Tanner Lybrand won the 35-39 and was 4th overall. Daniel Mosher and Amy Magee both placed 2nd in the 40-44. Adam Lawrimore took 2nd in the 45-49 behind the sasquatch. Merrit McNeely was 1st and Jennifer McLeod 3rd in the 45-49 women. Kirkwood and H took the top 2 in the men’s 55-59, while Lynda Leonardi and Pam Griffin did the same among the women. Beverly Bauer and Sue Porter were 2-3 in the 60-69 group. Brigitte Smith won the 70+ women while George Cassidy, Jerry Rich and Leeds Barroll swept the men’s podium.
Notable finishers – Most importantly, Patrick Hall is the actual winner of this race, since he was the only one who ran the whole correct course. Other finishers included Joey and Gabriella Swearingen, Antjuan Seawright, Stephanie Mosher, Marcus Cunningham. Tameika Cunningham, Alex Ponomarev, Pete Poore, Harry Strick, Ron and Helene Lipe, Jennifer Reeves, Bridgette and Bryan Honor and current CRC tour race participation leader, Margie Shelburg.
So I’m pretty sure the last time I double dipped, I swore I was done. Two races, one morning. It’s stressful and exhausting. But when I see the stars align for a DD opportunity, I get a wicked case of FOMO and I guess I can’t help myself. As per the usual, porch IPAs may also have been involved.
This double looked to be an easy one. Seven thirty start for the Fill the Pack 5k and 9 am for MLK. A quick google maps look showed a 22-minute drive between race sites. As someone who has pulled off a triple dip twice and a 30-minute double, this should be a piece of cake.
Plus, these were going to be two good races. I’ve done the MLK probably ten times and it’s always well done with cool awards. It used to be on Strictly’s old Palmetto Grand Prix and brought out all the beasts. It still usually has some decent competition, and the course is conducive to some fast times. I had no idea about Fill the Pack, but it was being held on the legendary Stomp the Swamp course at River Bluff, which is brutally hard but features a cool start/finish in the high school football stadium.
Waking up on race morning, I had my usual moment of Why the hell do I do this to myself??, made even worse by the fact it was 40ish degrees and raining. Awesome. But I had to do at least Fill the pack for two reasons. One, Tracy was coming out for a pro bono Jedi photo shoot and despite my questionable looks, I can’t help but be an attention whore. Two, the Visser. The dude (Michael Visser) has been all over social media in search of his first sub-20, and I couldn’t help but get caught up in his enthusiasm, since that was basically me in 2010. I told him “Come follow me to a sub 20”. I couldn’t let him down, right? Yeah, we’ll get to that.
I showed up an hour early and the race already had a decent crowd. It is apparently being used by F3 as their local running championship, so some pretty fast looking dudes out there. I don’t understand F3’s lack of racing, but they will show out when they actually put on a bib. I always have to look out for unknown superfit millennial soccer dads with this group. Branham is already there blowing up the bathroom and adjusting his nose strip when I arrive. I’ve made up some of the gap between us, but he is still kicking my ass since my Achilles betrayed me in ’23. Wesley also shows up a couple of minutes later. I used to be able to beat him too, but recently he’s been giving me a smackdown more often than not. And then there’s the Visser, who I apparently completely misjudged since he’s dressed like an elite in a singlet and arm warmers and is super lean. I only found one potential double dipper in Margie Shelburg. With her average 5k of around 50 minutes, this would be a tough double, but she swore she would do it, even if it meant an HYC style late start at MLK.
Thankfully for the doublers, we started right on time, and the weather wasn’t too terrible. Kind of a light mist, low 40s. Definitely different from the mid-August swelter of Stomp the Swamp. The start is a diagonal across the football field and wow, everyone is hauling ass immediately. It should be known this course will destroy you if you go out too fast. It’s mostly uphill for the first half, with a part they call the “calf crusher”, a huge hill in the middle of campus that you go up and come right back down. But first you have to climb out of the sports complex, and that’s no joke either. Branham has a good lead on me only a quarter mile in, and apparently Visser will not be “following me to a sub 20” because he’s already out of sight. We hit the calf crusher, and it certainly is aptly named. I manage to catch Trey McCain and we basically climb it together, both chasing Wes, who is about 10 meters ahead.
The Visser
I feel decent in the early going and decide that I must be killing it since the pace feels fast. We kick out into a parking lot after the calf crusher and the 6:15 mile of my mind is actually 6:41. WTF?? I guess the hills are taking a greater toll than I thought. I try to kick it up a notch but even the parking lot and the connector to the upper entrance of campus is uphill. Around 1.5 you enter a forest paved trail area that is pretty steep in some sections. Yeah, this isn’t helping my pace. Finally, I hit the top of the course in the forest and start plummeting down. I’m afraid of slipping and ripping something in another sharp turn as we enter into another parking lot (site of Silent H’s most recent injury). I didn’t think it was possible, but mile 2 is even slower at 6:57. Jeez this more like the 21-minute pace group than a sub 20. But at least the rest is almost completely downhill. I crank it up a notch and manage to pass a younger guy in a yellow shirt, then set my sights on Wes. Unfortunately for me, Wes is not having it and I’m having trouble closing the gap. We hit the sports complex again and counselor Sawyer is still holding me off. But I’ve been known to channel my inner Rocket Sanders and pull off some epic blue shoeings on the astroturf of the River Bluff football field. Just ask Code Brown and the Yerg. As soon as my feet hit the soft turf, I start throwing down. But that is when the running gods paid me back for Blue shoeing and turkeying. No sooner is my kick in motion when I hear it. Footsteps. Oh no, no one passes me, right? Pace gets amped again but all I see is a yellow blur as the guy I passed whips by me like I’m standing still. DAMMIT. As it turns out he and three other young dudes up ahead join forces and whip Wes’ ass too. Both of us brutally Gen Z’d. I end up with my tail between my legs, crossing the line in 20:21. 6:09 last mile and a 5:39 kick, and I still get a beat down. Oh well, still good enough for 1st in AG, though no overall points since I was 12th. Visser absolutely crushed a 19:20, a huge PR and probably good for a sub 19 on a flat course. Thankfully he decided not to follow the chunky old man.
Blue shoed. From Jedi Runner Photography
In the overall, Patrick Timmerman took the win in 17:42, with top F3 John Mouzakis second in 18:58. Rowan Anders was 3rd in 19:17. The women’s race was won by Leah Austin in 21:22. Twelve year old CRCer Cooper “Honey Badger “ Robbins took 2nd in 25:16. Fellow CRCer Shenequa Coles took 3rd in 26:36. Branham took home male masters in 19:58 while Geraldine Schnupp was the women’s winner in 27:34. Highlights of the age groupers included Mark Bedenbaugh and Mark Gallagher winning the 60-64 men. Pam Griffin won the 55-59 women, while Patrick McElderry and Kenny Culbertson went 1-2 in the 50-54 men. Double dipper Margie was 3rd in the 65-69 women. Full results here: https://www.strictlyrunning.com/json/Index_JS_C4.asp?uYear=2025&uRaceId=4520&uEvent=5k
MLK start
After a failed attempt to recruit Wes for the double, I jumped in the car to head to MLK. The twenty-ish minute drive was just enough to get my legs super stiff. It didn’t help I was cold, wet and was wallowing in my shame from the football field. If I hadn’t forked out the cash already, I probably would’ve bailed. I get there with over half an hour to spare, which is a good thing, because my colon decides to wake up a la the True to the Poo incident on the Palmetto trail. It’s still freezing and now I’m doing bathroom intervals to add to my misery. Brady had told me the registrations were pretty similar for these races, but the terrible weather has apparently driven quite a few away from MLK. CRC hardcore regulars were out there though, with Jimmy and Hunter Jarvis, Tanner Lybrand, Shannon Godby, Ashley Graham, Pete Poore, Ponomarev, Kirkwood, Shawanna, Artis Love, Ivery Baldwin, Joyce Welch, Lynda Leonardi, Jenny Nance, Michele Edmundson, Stephanie Mosher, Darci and Pippa Kenagy, Asheigh and Lauren Carpenter, Marcus Cunningham, Gretchen Lambert, Bridgette Honor, Jerry Rich and Marcus Cunningham. Margie made it there in time too, with 4 minutes to spare! Pete has done this race over 30 times and is probably an honorary member of Alpha Phi Alpha, the fraternity that puts this race on.
The course for MLK is certainly easier than FTP. The first mile is a pancake flat loop around MLK park and into 5 points. Mile two is the tough one, a climb into Shandon on Blossom and King, a la the old Get to the Green course. After the turn around on Heyward, the last mile is mostly flat and downhill, save for a little bump at the end on Lee Street.
With the gun in race 2, I am feeling rough in the early going but start to loosen up on the back half of the park loop. I’m definitely the ugliest in a three-person pack with Shannon and Ashley. I get a flashback to 1995 chasing girls in five points. Ashley surges ahead and Shannon falls back a bit as we make the turn into Blossom. Mile 1 in 6:15. Hunter has already exited the zip code and Tanner has put a pretty big gap on us three. My legs are a little cashed, but my lungs feel better since they were already blown out at FTP. Despite my Sasquatchean physique, I’m better at hills than most, so I throw down the hammer on Blossom and break free. The Blossom/King hill combo is pretty brutal, so I mail in the next quarter mile to recover. Rounding the turn on Woodrow back to home feels good, so I try to at least stay in sight of Tanner. Mile 2 – 6:36. The last mile feels decent cardio wise, but my legs are begging me to stop. Thankfully, it’s all flat on Woodrow/Wheat and King on the way home. I’m running all alone but I’m still deathly afraid of getting a repeat of the last race. Apparently, Mr. Yellow shirt, Andre Smith, lives rent-free in my head now. Cresting the last hill on Lee st, it’s one long fall down a mountain to the finish. I can see the clock and it’s still in the 19s but it’s going to be close. One last blast and I manage to cross in 19:50. Whew! Very happy with the time for the second half of a double. Good enough for 3rd behind Hunter and Tanner, and 1st old man (Masters).
In the overall, Hunter Jarvis cruised to another win in 16:10. Tanner got 2nd in 19:10. Ashley managed to hold off Shannon for the top two spots in the women’s field, with Hannah Hilal 3rd. Shawanna scored 1st female masters while Kirkwood won among the men.
Age group honor roll: Pippa Kenagy and Lauren Carpenter took top 2 in the 11-20. Artis Love was 2nd in the 21-30 men. Sellers Valimohamed (nee Williamson) returned to racing with 1st in the 21-30 women. Ivery Baldwin was 3rdin the 41-50 men. Shawanna White, Merritt McNeely, and Ashleigh Carpenter won the 41-50 among the women. Joyce Welch and Lynda Leonardi took top 2 in the 51-60 women. Legends Jerry Rich, Alex Ponomarev and Pete Poore swept the 70+.
Gobbles the Turkey. I stared at this costume monstrosity for a long time on Amazon in 2019 before pulling the trigger. It included an oversized tail, faux beer-belly like turkey gut, giant wings and a hideous head cap with hanging gobbler. To say it was ugly is a vast understatement. But a dare from Erin and my dedication to duty as part-time GRIT endurance spokesmodel was too great to resist. The Shandon Turkey Trot and Burn unofficial mascot was born.
45 bucks well spent
The Trot and Burn actually is the resurrection of the original Shandon Turkey Trot, which had been a Columbia running fixture for more than 30 years. It used to feature a 8k race and 4k walk/run and featured a psychologically brutal course, since it was 2 loops. But the race started getting overshadowed by the ton of other Thanksgiving races and it started to die off. Fortunately, GRIT moved the event to Black Friday in 2019 and the race has been regaining momentum ever since. The first year had 300ish runners and this year it was just short of 800. Clearly it was all because of my spokesmodeling.
The original promo from 2019
My original thought with the turkey costume in 2019 was just to phone in an easy run, but as it turns out, I have nothing less than 100 percent to give once that bib gets pinned on. The turkey costume is also deceptively run friendly, as it essentially comes down to running in a slightly heavy dress. The legs come out one hole – just hike it up and blast out the speed. The only real pain is the constantly flapping beer belly and the constricting head piece. Somehow, I churned out a 19:06 in the thing back in 2021, which I can’t even do in regular clothes now. In recent years Rob has joined me as an anorexic Santa. I’ve managed to beat him in years past, but just barely, leading to multiple epic holiday costume showdowns on the last drag on Woodrow St.
2021
Fast forward to this year, and things are looking rough for a good turkey time. The Richmond marathon was great but wrecked me for at least a half a week. I could barely walk. Of course, I couldn’t miss the Sleigh Bell Trot on Monday so I had to do that. And there was the 10 miles at Randy’s Thanksgiving Day long run the day before, coupled with an overly aggressive front yard wiffle baseball game at my parents’ house for Thanksgiving. Needless to say, I was feeling less than confident about churning out another fast 5k. But apparently perpetually abusing my body is my favorite thing to do, so let’s go.
I warmed up a little with the world’s skinniest Santa, but the main concern is MAKING SURE I DON’T HAVE TO POOP. I mean that’s always a problem, but figuring out the portapotty logistics in a giant turkey outfit is less than ideal. Luckily my colon appeared to be cooperating.
Start line from JP photography
At the start line, this thing is huge. I couldn’t even see the back of the pack, but I think it had to be diverted into the Shandon Presbyterian parking lot. There were definitely some fast people in this race but I made sure to toe the line for maximum picture exposure. I take my egomania very seriously. The start was a total stampede, and I may or may have not have almost clotheslined Ashley Holman with my wing flapping. This course is a series of Shandon rectangles and is mostly flat, but the Woodrow start is an absolute racetrack. No elevation change and straight as an arrow for a half mile. I feel like I’m going pretty hard, but I’ll be damned if Shannon and Rob/Santa aren’t leaving me for dead right off the bat. I try and settle in a rhythm. Drew and Tracy are at the first turn on Heyward, so more grandiose picture posing ensues. Rounding the corner, we fly down a long decline on Heyward before rising up near Sims street. Mile one in 6:29. Looks like a sub 20 may not be in the cards today. Pretty soon I catch up with Ed Aufuldish and try and surge past. But Fast Eddie is not having it. I try and hang on his coattails while the course turns on to Ott, Duncan and then the turnaround on Bonham right near the old Dry Run (R.I.P.) finish line. Turning back home on Wilmot is a relief because I am definitely sucking wind at this point. It doesn’t help my gobbler keeps rising up and blocking my mouth. Kristin Wallace is on hand to take some pics of his absolutely beautiful scene, with my turkey dress showing my white ass legs and my face half covered. Oh, the sacrifices I make for my performance art.
Kristin Wallace’s pic
Mile 2 is in 6:33so it’s going to take an epic kick to pull off the sub 20. But I dream at night of epic kicks, so here goes. Ed is telling me he’s not in 5k shape, and he is post-marathon too, so I manage to slide past him as we turn back on to Heyward. I can see crystal meth Santa ahead but there is no way I can catch him. Ed is still right on my tail too. Turning onto Woodrow for the half mile finish, I make one half-hearted wing flap for Tracy’s video then push in all the kick chips. Near Hand middle, I can just about make out the clock and it’s going to be close for that 19:59. I see Shannon just ahead and I almost think about sparing her the turkey trample, but it’s already too late for that. I catch her about 50 meters out and blast towards the line like it’s the Olympic 100 meter final. BAM. 19:52 by my Garmin. Full on HYC style collapse in the finish chute. I’ll take it. Good enough for 2nd in AG behind Ozempic Santa.
Poetry in motion, JP photography
Swag is awesome as usual with Turkey trophies for all the overall/age group winners, plus the all-important group competition with COLUMBIA RUNNING CLUB taking first place (over 50 entrants) ! We got a box of pretzels and a giant turkey pretzel as well from Philly pretzel factory. Epic carb load!
Stuffing the turkey (photo Deana Rennick)
In the men’s overall Mark Kushinka crushed the field with a 16:14 with Liam Jones and Daniel Brown 2nd and 3rd. Fort Mill’s Angeline Kravitz took the women’s win but our own Ashley Holman was 2nd . Beth Walker was 3rd.
Masters: The men’s division was a trio of grandmasters beasts with Robert McBee, Herbert Krabel and Jeff Brandenburg. These guys are all 57 and over and still killing it. Shannon threw down a mean kick and broke 20 to take the women’s masters win, solidifying her 3rd place ranking in the state. Erin Abby and Barbara Brandenburg were 2nd and 3rd.
Age group honor roll women: Lilly Holman won the 11-14. Michaela Willoughby won the 25-29. Sara McFall was 1stin the 35-39 and Korinne Collins was 3rd with a new 5k PR! Amy Magee was 1st and Megan Duffy was 3rd in the 40-44. Stephanie Fischer, Shenequa Coles and Angie Thames swept the 50-54. Joyce Welch and Lynda Leonardi were 1-2 in the 55-59. Melody Kreiling and Lisa Powell went 1-2 in the 60-64, while Carol Wallace and Beverly Breuer did the same in the 65-69. Kathy Paget won the 75-79.
Age group honor roll men: Finn Jaworek was tops in the 1-10. Parker Roof was 2nd in the 20-24. Regan Freeman and David Chen were 1-2 in the 25-29. Wesley Sawyer and Jonathan McFall were 2nd and 3rd in the 35-39. Yerg, the turkey and Michael Beets won the 45-49. Ed Aufuldish, Frank Seier and Randy Hrechko swept the 55-59. Phil Smith and Jeff Radenbaugh went 1-3 in the 60-64. Jerry Rich and Leeds Barroll were 1-2 in the 70-74. Alex Ponomarev and Richard Wright were 2-3 in the 75-79. Jesse Smarr was 3rd in the 80 plus!
Notable finishers:
Eric Gilfus, Joey and Gabby Swearingen, Antjuan Seawright, Patrick Hall, The Outlaw family, The Fischer family, Ashleigh Carpenter, Merritt McNeely, Bertha woehl, The Homeyer family, Kana Rahman, Missy Caughman, Michael Beaudet, Lynn Ann Sawyer, Penny Leitner, Roy and Riana Shelley, Pam Griffin, Jessalyn Smith, Teresa Harrington, April Joyner, Melinda Waldrop, Gretchen Lambert, Pete Poore, Heather Hawn, Dawn Fellers, Cassidy Carter, Nicole Charlton, Kelly Hynes, Ron Hagell, Tee Coker, Stevie Dee Dukes, Heather Herndon, Kristin and Poppy Laughlin, Margie Shelburg, Amy Hildreth, Simon Krabel, Michelle Edmundson, Kerry Stubbs. Sorry to those I missed!
Collages by Tracy Tisdale, editor in chief, CRC NEWSLETTER , pics from facebook and JP photography where indicated
The Nightmare in Elmwood 5k is one of the newer races on tour, first held in 2022, but it’s already one of my favorites. I mean, you don’t have to twist my arm to do race cosplay, and this one actually encourages it. Add in a unique course, GRIT endurance direction and a lot of neighborhood support and there’s no surprise why this event is already popular.
My biggest concern, like trying to find a good pair of blue shoes, is the unique balancing act of finding a cool costume that is also at least somewhat “runnable”. The fact is most runnable costumes are fairly lame and the coolest ones are terrible for trying to throw down a decent 5k. I mean, I love costumes, but I also love CRC points. And with my insane age group, I ‘m going to need to need at least a sub-21. I was seriously thinking about a more timely Beetlejuice ensemble, but I’ve come to realize that if I want to run fast, it’s going to have to be in a dress. And Beetlejuice is full on striped suit with pants, like HYC post race. Oh sure, they may call them tunics, kilts or robes. But let’s be real, any fast costumes have dresses. Also, ventilation is key. Halloween always seems to end up in some fourth or fifth conjuring of summer that never seems to end in this town. I have pics of my poor 3-year-old ready to have heat stroke because daddy thought he looked so cute as a (pre Mandalorian) baby Yoda. So, I once again surrendered my man card and went in search of the coolest (literal and metaphorical) dress I could find.
Fortunately, I enlisted some help from another fellow cosplayer, your newsletter editor Mrs. Tisdale, and came across Halloweencostumes.com. For what they lack in name creativity, they certainly make up for in terms of selection. And they had an awesome William Wallace Braveheart costume. Sure, a 1995 movie that probably no one under 40 has seen isn’t exactly timely, but I’ve been stuck in the mid-90s for the past three decades anyway.
I thought I got a good deal on the costume, but it turns out the model online was also sporting about 30 bucks of accessories like the sword, wig and blue face paint. Oh well, I had already committed so I shelled out the cash. Trying on everything at home showed me it was an awesome costume, and definitely runnable. The con was that the wig, which also could double for any 1980s hair band ensemble, was insanely itchy and hot. But alas, I must suffer for my art.
On race morning, I was nervous about putting on the blue makeup, so I skipped any double dipping. Fortunately, my wife is understanding of my overall bizarreness, so she gave me a brief tutorial of using sponge wedges to apply the blue face paint. That morning I gained a new appreciation for what women go through, as I desperately tried not to ruin my blue foundation with wig hair flyaways. I kept having to flamboyantly flip my hair back and I decided that my man card may need to be permanently revoked. Though this may have already happened thanks to my Downton Abbey/Bridgerton obsession, so I guess it was all good.
I showed up to the race an hour early and one of the parking lots was already full. Dang, this was getting to be a big event. Lots of Halloweening out there, so I figured I had minimal chance of winning the costume contest. My extensive experience has shown that cute kids win everytime, with hot girls a close second. Dead last are middle aged man-children with wigs and makeup. JP photography was there along with freelancer Sean Rayford so hopefully I’d get lots of pics at least. My ego needs feeding somehow.
I warmed up some on the course, having done the whole thing on Friday. The race goes to benefit the Elmwood Neighborhood Association, so the homeowners go all out on the decorations, especially since there’s a prize for the best one. Seriously, I’ve never seen a community so into an event. Yerg, who was not in costume, ran some with me, so I knew masters was already out of the picture. The course has an insane drop and tough climb in the beginning and the end, though a lot of the middle is fairly flat. The route takes you through Elmwood then does an out and back to Finlay Park before returning to the finish.
With the start, I made sure to pose for Julie, because I just have to be an attention whore. We headed out on Bryan street before turning right on Park and then plummeted down the hill. It’s pretty steep, and I kept thinking Julia Ghering in her Michael Myers mask might end up on the concrete. That would be a weird ER trip for sure. After reaching the bottom, you head right back up on Lincoln. At this point I had broken free from the pack, but Yerg, Regan, and Shannon were kicking my ass. Dr. Kushinka had already destroyed the field out in front. I always set my sights on “first costume” in this race and there was some dude in a Bob Ross outfit with a dress shirt, artist’s palette, brushes and jeans that was right by my side. Poor Bob had already sweated through his shirt like he had jumped in a lake. We were together through the top of the hill when I felt a loosening of my kilt/dress and the whole shoulder wrap fell off. OMG, I’m going to have to stop. THERE ARE ONLY UNDIES DOWN THERE. I don’t need any more moments like the green velour leprechaun incident, which make gray sweatpants seem modest. Fortunately, I was able to yank the strap up, reach around and tuck it in my belt with only a few seconds of jogging mid-race. Never have I been more grateful for switching out the cheap fabric costume belt with a real leather one.
The short break actually helped a little, so I kicked it back into 5k mode and caught up with Bob Ross. One mile mark was in 6:40ish near the Elmwood Cemetery. We then hit the Vista Greenway which is mostly flat. Bob , whose real name is Bruce, asks me what my real 5k time is. His is apparently 19:50ish, so I felt like I could probably take him, especially with his jeans. Though he did look 20 something so you never know. I was able to pass him near the turnaround in Finlay Park and we headed back home. The way back was cool since you got to see everyone else in the field. Lots of cool costumes. Heading back into Elmwood, I was getting slightly faster but the hair band mop on my head was absolutely cooking my brain. I climbed the first hill and saw Rayford taking pics. One of Sean’s photos was on the front of the New York Times for Hurricane Helene a few weeks ago, so I did my best William Wallace charge in his direction. I’m sure a random cosplay dude in a costume 5k in Columbia is also NYT cover worthy. I fell down the cliff again to Confederate Avenue and steeled myself for the brutal Park St climb. It’s short but it is insanely steep. I powered up Park and could see Yerg, Shannon, Parker Roof and Regan ahead. I saw Parker stop to walk for a second and I started trying to throw down a kick. Sadly, I only had fumes left. Regan and Shannon also seemed to get Parker running again, so I realized I wasn’t going to have enough room to catch them. One last turn onto Bryan street and I could see the 20s on the clock already. I mounted a weak kick, but made sure to pose for Julie again at the finish. Time was 20:41, so not too shabby, especially given that course and the near wardrobe malfunction. I’ll take it!
In the overall men, Kushinka crushed the field in 17:10, with Benjamin Laprise 2nd and Robert McBee 3rd. Shelby Gurley was top female, with Shannon Godby 2nd and Avery Farr 3rd. Male Masters was won by the Yerg, while Ronda Sanders was tops among the masters women.
Age Group honor roll (female): Jordan Seeger was 2nd in the 20-24. Michaela Willoughby and Julia Ghering were 2-3 in the 25-29. Mary Kate Korpita won the 30-34. Ashleigh Carpenter was 3rd in the 40-44, while Kristin Wallace and Sarah Soltau were 2-3 in the 45-49. Welcome back, Sarah! Stevie Dee took 2nd in the 50-54, while Lynda Leonardi and Pam Griffin went 1-3 in the 55-59. Brigitte Smith was tops in the 75+
Age Group honor roll (men): Parker was 2nd in the 20-24. Regan Freeman and Bruce Edmonds were 2-3 in the 25-29. William Wallace was 1st in the 45-49. Drew Dickerson was 3rd in the 50-54, while Roy Shelley and Joey Swearingen were 1-2 in the 55-59. Clay Ham and Eliere Tolan were 1-3 in the 60-64. Jerry Rich was champ and Pete Poore 3rd in the 70-74. Ron Hagell and Richard Wright claimed the top 2 in the 75+
Other notable finishers: Antjuan Seawright, Korinne Collins, Karen Kryzanowski, Eme Crawford, Michael and Clara Beaudet, Missy Caughman, Leighton McClendon, Marcus Cunningham, Wendy Homyer, Makenzie Wilt, Sara Wilcox, Kana Rahman, Kara Clyburn, Melinda Waldrop, Gretchen Lambert, Hou-Yin Chang, Nikki Charlton, Michelle Edmondson, Jennifer Glass, Lynn Kramer, Kerry Stubbs, Heather Hawn, Shiela Bolin, Margie Shelburg, Rachel Trott, Susan Weaver, Kristin and Poppy Loughlin.
The costume contest was basically prizes for everyone, though true to my prediction the kids (toy story) and the Fia group (Inside Out) were probably the top choices. I did get a bag of Cromer’s popcorn to soothe my ego though!
The Springdale 5k in Camden has been a staple of the Blue Shoes calendar since 2009, when it used to be held on the horse track, in the evening, in August. Although the post-race beer and party were on point, the 95-degree weather and ankle-deep grass definitely left something to be desired. Luckily, Erin Roof and GRIT revamped the race about a decade ago and changed it to the neighborhood near the horse track, switched it to morning, and delayed it to September. While the morning is less beer friendly, she made up for it with a full-service waffle station. It is a sight to behold. There is a slight possibility that you may not have burned off waffle-level calories in a 5k, but I like to remain blissfully ignorant of that.
With the fall race season about to kick in, this weekend’s tour provided three races, which would hopefully spread the field out for trophy opportunities. The church one in Lexington looked promising for a possible holy grail overall win, but do they have waffles??? I don’t think so. In addition to breakfast bliss, Springdale also offers giant horsehead trophies, which are second only to the Stomp the Swamp (R.I.P.) gator head for pure awesomeness.
Camden is only 25 minutes from my house, so I showed up my customary hour early. They have a mobile home like bathroom set up instead of portapotties, perfect for my also customary colonic destruction. Craft and Draft Friday happy hour will always exact its toll. One of my issues with this race is misjudging the finish, so I did a quick mile out and back to make some visual markers to know where I was. FYI, 1912 Forest Drive is almost exactly a mile from the finish arch.
Strolling up to the start line, I started to get a little nervous. Yes, there were a fair number of teenagers there. But no Jarvis, no Branham, no Striggles…. could this be another holy grail? I’m still holding on to my embarrassing non-tour 2023 Veteran’s Day 5k lean-at-the-tape at full Mach 5 blue shoe kick to beat a 19 year old girl as my last win. Shame is not a burden with which I deal.
I started thinking about strategy. It’s actually very simple. One half downhill and flat, one half uphill. You want to go hard in the first 1.5 miles, but you have to leave plenty in the tank for that climb. It’s not super steep, just unrelenting.
At the start, all the kids blast out way too fast and it takes most of a quarter mile before they drop off. A half mile in, and I’m freefalling down the course. The kid at the very front, who went out in like 5 flat pace, suddenly stops and I think he’s done. One of the neighborhood dogs comes tearing out and starts losing its mind barking, which I guess gives him enough adrenaline to get him going again. And I’ll be damned if he isn’t hauling ass again. Luckily the dog chills out a bit and gives us all a WTF ARE ALL THESE HUMANS COMING FROM look. One human I’m concerned about is a dude with some gray and a myrtle beach marathon singlet. I’m chasing kids, but I can’t be complacent about unknown fast dads. He’s just to my side, so I throw down a burst to try and break a fellow old man’s spirit. Mile 1 comes through in 6:15, which is probably ideal for my race plan. Fast enough to be near the front but not fast enough to destroy me.
I spend the flat area at the hill bottom trying to psych myself up for the pain that will ensue. The front runner guy is blasting the field, and I can barely see him. I guess the holy grail will remain elusive. There is one other kid about 20 meters ahead, so I set my sights on taking him down. The hill starts and it is not fun. That nice shady breeze in the first half suddenly gets replaced by a wet blanket of warmth and humidity. While it might not be a flattering fashion choice with my frighteningly white body, at least my singlet is letting in some ventilation. Mile 2 in 6:35, so I guess I got a little too scared of the hill. Gotta pick it up to break 20 and catch this kid in front of me. But oof it is getting tough. I’m still fighting off a year of Achilles-based trash fitness and probably some IPA pounds, so this is not fun. But I am ever so slowly reeling in the kid. The hill just keeps going, and each corner seems like the end. Finally, there’s a flat stretch and I can see one of those free library boxes that signifies the last turn. I start throwing down hard and pretty soon I’m right on this dude’s tail. He’s probably 120 lbs. tops but I am going to pass him like a runaway 18-wheeler. But then it happens. Just as I creep up on his side, he throws down an epic kick of his own and leaves me in the dust. Nooooooo! But there’s nothing I can do. The old man is getting beat at his own game. To make matters worse, I can also tell I am going to just miss 20 minutes. I cross in 20:03, 3rd overall. Not my best, but I can’t say I left much on the course. It did help that the kid, 15-year-old Jake Rust, scored a PR and was super happy with it. Good job, Jake. The old man gives you props…and I’m coming for you next time.
In the overall, 16-year-old Ben Rabon took the win, fighting off a dog in the process. Jake was 2nd and the Albino Sasquatch 3rd. Eleven-year-old Skyler Spilker won the female overall with Sarah Carroway and Jennfer Carruth also on the podium.
John Campolongo, Roy Shelley and Whitney Keen won male masters, while Ronda Sanders, Melody Kreiling and Zaiton Abubakar won on the women’s side. Melody was also the overall age graded time at 76%!
Age group women: Hayden Hall own the 11-14. Noa Miller took the 30-34. Catherine Sostak was 3rd in the 40-44. Kritin Wallace won the 45-49 with dog in tow. Caroline Keen and Clara Beaudet went 2-3 in the 50-54. Bertha Woehl was 3rd int eh 55-59 while Colleen Towery won the 60-64. Beverly Breuer and Mary Cassidy were 1st and 3rd in the 65-69
Age group men: Eric Gilfus won the 35-39. Whitney Keen and Anthony Godfrey took the top 2 in the 50-54. Clay Ham, Joe Roof and Phil Smith swept the 60-65. George Cassidy was champ of the 70-74, while Richard Wright won the 75+ . Bill Iskrzak was 3rd in the 75+ in his first race back after injury. Good to see you back, Bill!
Other notable finishers: Patrick Hall, Marty Wentzel, Drew Dickerson, Michael Beaudet, Teresa Shelton, Deanna Rennick, Pete Poore, Nicki Charlton, Traci Smith and Jennifer Norris.